Sep 282022

Explorer’s Log: I am on day twenty-four of my forty-one day journey to the star system designated “The Queen’s Unearthly Ass that Haunts the Dreams of All Who See It,” by Royal Astronomers. This area of space continues to be very quiet with no signs of space travel of any kind. It is like traveling on the loneliest highway for light years.

Regarding the probe ship, I still can’t find the cause for the temperature decrease inside the living quarters. There is a small space barely as wide as my feet together that feels about ten degrees colder than the rest of the ship, but sensors detect nothing. Fortunately, the spot is beside my bunk so it doesn’t bother me when I am sleeping. I’ll assign Chairbot the problem and let him diagnose it.

The language of the race I have designated Dead Fuckers-One continues to elude me. It resembles the theoretical language known as Ebrima but what little text I have discovered is nonsense. Hopefully I will not encounter any more of their worlds but just in case I do, I will continue to analyze their language. End Explorer’s Log.

Explorer’s Personal Log: Dead Fuckers-One may have a shitty language but they make really good sex toys. The blue dildo I recovered from the last world has a vibration function that is quite pleasurable. I have been using it twice a day and it shows no signs of wearing out.

Vaquel Di sat back in Chairbot’s seat. The space explorer was naked except for her belt. Both of her thick brown legs stretched out to rest her heels on the navigation console. She had one hand on a heavy breast while the other hand plunged a blue vibrator in and out of her wet pussy. The short pink hair on her head was soaked with sweat and was almost as wet as the thick pink bush of her pubic hair.

“Oh fuck, I’m close,” Vaquel grunted. The vibrator undulated in her hand. Powerful vibrations radiated through her sex.

Chairbot moaned. The loyal robot gently pulsed the vibration motors in his seat. All of his sensors were dedicated to reading the tremors of Vaquel’s round ass pressing against him.

Vaquel trembled. It wouldn’t be long now. She plunged the toy in deeper.

The vibrations from the dildo diminished greatly in intensity.

“Queen’s tit!” Vaquel swore. Did she turn it down somehow? She thought it only turned on and off.

Vaquel pushed the thought away. The more important question was whether she could climax before the vibrations died completely. She rammed the toy into her sex and willed herself to come sooner.

The vibrations slowed to a bare tremor. After two more thrusts, the vibrations died altogether.

“Fuck!” Vaquel yelled.

“Mistress, do you wish me to finish you off?” Chairbot offered. The talented robot had multiple force fields and vibration motors capable of finishing the job. He was also eager to prove his superiority as a sex toy.

Before Vaquel could answer, the dildo pulsed in her pussy. A beam of light emitted from the base of the toy and projected a shape in front of Vaquel.

It was a hologram of a blue humanoid. The wide hips, enormous breasts as well as the smooth lips at their groin indicated that they were female. Short curly hair, almost the mirror of Vaquel’s except that it was green, clung to the woman’s head. Wide lips opened to reveal an inviting mouth with a long tongue.

Vaquel recognized the species as Dead Fucker-One. She had seen enough of their corpses on the last two dead planets to recognize one. This was the first one she had seen still alive, even if only a hologram.

“Are you interactive?” Vaquel asked.

The hologram reached between her legs. She opened her blue sex lips to reveal the thick base of a dildo that matched the one inside Vaquel. The hologram pulled the dildo out of herself and then held it up.

A large bar appeared next to the holographic dildo. The bar was as long as the dildo at first but rapidly shrank down to a flat line. The line blinked urgently.

“Mistress, it is using visual symbols to convey that the vibrator is out of power,” Chairbot said.

“Quit bot-explaining,” Vaquel said. “I got that. This isn’t my first alien holographic pantomime.”

The holographic woman placed her vibrator at her blue breast and rubbed the head against her nipple. As she did that, the floating power indicator began to glow. The hologram moved the toy back and forth between her nipples.

“This must be a recharging protocol,” Vaquel said.

“But Mistress, your mammary glands do not emit energy!” Chairbot said.

“Maybe it is powered by friction,” Vaquel said. She pulled the vibrator out of her pussy. The thick toy slipped out, covered in juices. Vaquel pressed the tip of the toy to her right nipple and rubbed her sensitive tip with the toy.

Another hologram appeared beside the toy. It was another bar, but this one was only as long as her fingernail. Fortunately, it was growing with each circle of Vaquel’s nipple.

“Good work, Mistress!” Chairbot said. “Should I emit a force field to stimulate intercourse?”

“No!” Vaquel said. “This damn toy interrupted my orgasm. I’ll be the one to get it back.”

Chairbot’s seat motors ceased in quiet protest.

Vaquel moved the vibrator to her other breast. The holographic woman smiled and copied her motion. Together, Vaquel and the hologram rubbed the vibrator into their left breast.

The vibrator purred to life. It was a weak pulse but it took Vaquel by surprise. She moaned as the vibrations played across her hard nipple.

The hologram moaned too. Was it just copying Vaquel? Probably, but there was the possibility that there was an artificial intelligence inside the toy. It might be programmed to feel pleasure as well.

The holographic woman moved her toy between her plump blue breasts. Using one arm, she gathered her tits around the facsimile of the toy. One hand slid the toy up and down between her breasts of projected light.

Vaquel copied the hologram. The alien had much larger tits but Vaquel’s brown mountains were more than adequate. Vaquel cinched her mounds together while she used the toy to fuck her tits.

The holographic bar increased in length. The vibrations from the toy grew slightly stronger. Pleasant pulses emanated from the toy and into Vaquel’s bountiful tits.

“Oh fuck,” Vaquel whispered. The toy was still slick from her pussy and it slid easily up and down her soft flesh. It was starting to dry though and Vaquel wondered how long she could keep this up before friction played a part.

The holographic woman tilted her head down and spat on the faux toy between her breasts.

Vaquel paused in mid-stroke. Did the vibrator sense the friction and then modify the hologram to give instructions? Or was their instruction pre-programed for just this possibility? How smart was her alien sex toy?

The vibrations diminished between her tits. The floating bar blinked impatiently. It was waiting for Vaquel’s participation.

“Oh, it must be broken, Mistress,” Chairbot said.

“Nice try, fucker,” Vaquel said. She knew how jealous the robot could get of other toys.

Vaquel tilted her head down and spat onto the toy between her tits. The thick gob landed right on the tip. As the toy slid down, it brought her spit down between the canyon of her breasts. She gave the toy a slight twist to smear the spit all around.

The holographic bar began to grown again. The vibrations returned. The bar grew mere centimeters with every thrust of the toy but at least it was growing.

The vibrations were weak between Vaquel’s tits but the desire within her pussy was just as strong as when she was fucking herself. Vaquel was tempted to plunge the toy back in herself. The slight vibrations might be enough to get her off and if they weren’t, Vaquel could compensate by fucking the shit out of her pussy.

But Vaquel resisted the urge. The vibrator was getting stronger with every thrust between her tits. She wanted it even stronger.

The holographic woman changed positions. She sat down, her body clipping through the navigation console. The woman removed the toy from her tits and held it with two hands. One hand went to the base while the other hand encircled the tip.

The vibrations stopped. Vaquel wasn’t surprised. She pulled the toy out from between her tits and mimed how the hologram was holding the toy. As soon as her fingers wrapped around the tip, the vibrations returned.

The hologram stroked her toy. It was a slow, almost lazy slide from the tip down to her other hand. The stroke back up was just as slow.

Vaquel recreated the stroke. It was harder than it looked. Vaquel’s excitement caused her to move too fast. As soon as she broke the slow pace, the vibrations stopped until Vaquel was back in sync.

“You little tease,” Vaquel whispered.

The holographic woman slowly blinked both eyes. Was that an acknowledgment of Vaquel’s comment or just a quirk of the programming?

Together, Vaquel and the hologram stroked their toys. Vaquel settled into the slow rhythm but it wasn’t easy. Her pussy was hungry to be filled again. Every stroke of they toy seemed like a slow tease of her own sex. She caught herself grinding into Chairbot’s seat in frustration.

“Mistress, do you require stimulation?” Chairbot asked.

Vaquel almost said yes. She could order him to fuck her and then the motors in the seat would roar with power. Incredible vibrations would assault her pussy and make her ass go numb. It would be a powerful orgasm.

But the orgasm wouldn’t come from the toy and Vaquel had worked so hard to get the toy working again. She couldn’t give up now. Stubbornness demanded it.

“No,” Vaquel said out loud, a little terse and not at all convincing.

The holographic woman suddenly increased the pace of her stroking. She pumped her toy so hard that her giant breasts made of light jiggled and bounced. Her mouth opened in a sensual moan as if it was her own organ that she was stroking.

Vaquel cried out, partly from surprise and partly from the release of tension. She stroked the vibrator at a speed to match the hologram’s. Her own brown tits bounced wildly. Vaquel wondered if the hologram enjoyed the sight as much as Vaquel enjoyed the hologram’s jiggling.

The vibrator buzzed stronger. The power bar grew in leaps and decimeters.

The hologram suddenly stopped. There was a second’s pause and then it resumed stroking their toy at the previous slower pace. The glowing woman looked at Vaquel licked its lips in a very lascivious manner.

“No,” Vaquel whispered. She stroked her toy too fast for one cycle and the vibrations stopped altogether. Vaquel groaned and flexed her hand. It was tingling from the earlier vibrations. She forced herself to grip the toy again and resume the slow stroking.

The vibrations returned, though a bit weak. The floating bar shrunk just a little. Progress had been lost.

Vaquel groaned. This was ridiculous. The toy was too demanding. Sex toys should be giving pleasure, not delaying it! Vaquel had half a mind to toss the toy and order Chairbot to fuck her.

The other half of Vaquel’s mind was controlled by her pussy. Vaquel was frustrated but also wet and soaking Chairbot’s seat. With every delay, Vaquel’s sex craved the toy more.

Vaquel continued to stroke the toy. She simmered with resentment but she kept doing it. One long slow stroke down the length of the vibrating toy followed by one long slow stroke up to the tip. Over and over again as the power bar grew in small increments.

The holographic woman displayed no frustration. She licked her lips and blinked slowly at Vaquel. Both shoulders rolled in a sensuous manner that Vaquel caught herself copying.

Sometimes the hologram would tilt her head up and bite her lip in a savage manner while her eyes stayed locked on Vaquel. Tremors would go through the holographic body before the woman would release her bite and her head would tilt back down to normal. There would be a flush to the woman’s blue skin that would gradually fade.

Vaquel didn’t know what the biting was about but it was hot as fuck. Once more she wondered if the hologram was truly intelligent. Could it be a presentation of the vibrator’s artificial intelligence? Was Vaquel literally turning it on with her stroking?

The holographic woman stopped fondling her vibrator. She brought her version of the toy to her lips. First, she kissed the tip and then slowly pushed the toy into her mouth.

Vaquel copied the hologram. She kissed the head of her toy and tasted pussy and sweat. The toy buzzed weakly as it entered slid past Vaquel’s lips. The thick toy filled her mouth.

The hologram swallowed more of her toy so Vaquel did the same. The long toy hit the back of Vaquel’s throat and she briefly gagged. The holographic woman had no such troubles and kept pushing the toy until only the base of the vibrator emerged from her lips.

Vaquel struggled to do the same. The faint vibrations made her lips and tongue tingle. The tip of the toy was lodged deep in her throat. She felt herself start to gag again and she focused on relaxing her throat

The hologram didn’t move. Vaquel wondered if the simulation was frozen. No, the floating power bar was still growing if ever so slowly.

Tears sprang to Vaquel’s eyes. She breathed hard through her nose. The vibrator filled her mouth and throat.

The holographic woman reached between her legs of soft light. Three fingers plunged into a narrow blue slit. She fucked herself in front of Vaquel.

Vaquel’s hand moved to her own pussy. She didn’t care if it was part of the recharging protocol or not. Three brown fingers pushed through pink pubic hair and into her own brown slit. Wet heat greeted her fingers.

The holographic woman shuddered. The shoulders rolled as she fucked herself. Holographic drops of juice fell from her pussy.

Vaquel fucked herself. Tight walls clinched around her fingers. It felt so damn good.

A tremor ran through Vaquel’s body. It disturbed the delicate balance of her throat and the vibrator went too deep. Vaquel choked and almost pulled the toy from her mouth but she fought through her panic. The vibrator stayed deep in her throat as she regained control of her gagging.

“Would you like some anal penetration, Mistress?” Chairbot offered.

Vaquel groaned. She fucking would but she couldn’t bring herself to accept it. The holographic woman had been so demanding and Vaquel had met the challenge so far. She wanted to prove herself, even if it was to an alien sex toy.

“What was that, Mistress?” Chairbot inquired.

Vaquel growled with the toy in her mouth.

“Clench your ass once for anal penetration,” Chairbot said. “Clench your ass ten times to decline.”

Vaquel almost choked on the toy again. That bastard! She knew how much Chairbot loved to feel her buttocks move across his seat. If she got it wrong, the robot would happily ream her ass and although Vaquel would enjoy it at this point she wanted to deny him just to spite him.

There was only one thing Vaquel could do. She clenched her ass and released. As quickly as possible, she clenched a second and a third time.

Chairbot said nothing. If he counted, that would be helpful, which is exactly why he didn’t. Vaquel almost admired his selfishness.

The holographic woman continued to deep throat her copy of the toy. The floating power bar inched larger.

Drool filled Vaquel’s mouth. She parted her lips to let some of the drool fall from her mouth rather than risk choking on it. As the drool dripped down, Vaquel clenched her buttocks a fourth time.

A drop of spit hit Vaquel’s tit. Another tremor went through her body as she clenched her ass a fifth and sixth time.

Chairbot groaned. The seat tilted a single degree. The sudden movement shifted the toy in Vaquel’s throat.

She gagged during the seventh clench of her ass. As she fought to control her gagging, she clenched down hard an eight time. When she could breathe normally again, Vaquel clenched twice more.

Or did she? Vaquel had lost count. Should she clench again to make sure? Or will the greedy robot interpret an eleventh clench as permission to anally enter her?


As she debated, the floating bar pulsed with light. The holographic woman pulled the toy out of her mouth and held it up like a lamp. In case there was any doubt, the hologram spread her blue legs and plunged the toy back into her sex.

Vaquel pulled her toy out as well. She gasped for air and laughed weakly. “Fuck you, Chairbot! No ass-fucking for you!”

“Awwww, Mistress,” Chairbot sulked.

Vaquel didn’t care. She placed both feet on the navigation console in front of her and brought the vibrator down to her pussy. The thick slid easily back into her sex.

“Queen’s tit!” Vaquel cried. The vibrations were stronger than before. In fact, they had never been this strong. The toy must have been only half-charged when she recovered it from the planet.

The holographic woman stood up. She walked between Vaquel’s out-stretched legs. She squatted down and her large breasts made of light clipped through Vaquel’s thighs. Her face was decimeters away from Vaquel’s pussy. The blue eyes looked up at Vaquel and blinked slowly.

“Oh fuck,” Vaquel groaned. Was this part of the program or was this curiosity another sign of the hologram’s possible intelligence?

The hologram bit her bottom lip and tilted her head up.

“Glory to the Queen!” Vaquel cried out as she came. She clenched down hard on the buzzing vibrator.

The holographic woman dipped her head down onto Vaquel’s sex. The hologram clipped through Vaquel’s hand but she thought she could see the blue woman’s mouth open. The woman moved her head up and down as if she went through the motions of eating Vaquel’s pussy.

“Glory to the Queen!” Vaquel cried out as she came again.

The woman reached up with a holographic hand to cup Vaquel’s breast. The hand hovered at Vaquel’s jiggling tit. Vaquel’s couldn’t feel anything but the sight was enticing.

Vaquel’s need obliterated any lingering resentment she had for Chairbot’s game. “Chairbot, fuck my ass right now!”

“Yes, Mistress!” the robot said.

A slender forcefield was generated by Chairbot’s seat. It pushed against Vaquel’s anus with hyper-accuracy. The tingling field penetrated Vaquel with zero friction.

Vaquel moaned as her asshole was filled. Toes curled and she bit her own lip. All the while, she kept thrusting the vibrator deep into her pussy while the holographic woman mimed eating her.

The forcefield began to vibrate. Chairbot moaned as Vaquel’s ass squirmed in response. The robot added a thrusting motion to the forcefield’s projection.

“Glory to the Queen!” Vaquel cried out.

The hologram moved a hand to Vaquel’s pussy. She pushed four fingers into the soaked pussy. Vaquel couldn’t feel the hand but it was easy to imagine the vibrator was the hologram’s hand.

“Glory to the Queen!” Vaquel whispered as another orgasm slammed into her.

Micro-quakes rumbled across Vaquel’s twitching buttocks. Chairbot scanned every motion and experienced three activations of his own pleasure programs. The seat rumbled with excitement.

Chairbot’s forcefield pushed deeper into Vaquel’s ass. Powerful vibrations in her ass matched the ones stimulating her pussy. Fucked at both ends, Vaquel was pushed beyond her limits as she came again.

“Glory!” was all Vaquel could whisper as she climaxed.

It was too much. Vaquel was spent. She turned the knob at the base of the vibrator and the vibrations ceased.

“Chairbot, stop,” Vaquel said weakly.

The forcefield in Vaquel’s ass vanished, leaving only the memory of being so deeply filled.

The holographic woman remained. She stood up and looked down at Vaquel’s twitching body. Both hands went to her pussy and played with the vibrator buried within her. After a few strokes, the hologram slowly faded.

Vaquel sat in a puddle of her juices with the vibrator still inside her. Chairbot was reclining the seat so Vaquel could take a post-orgasmic nap. Vaquel began to pull the toy from her over-stimulated pussy but decided against it. She would take her nap with it inside her.

As Vaquel drifted off to sleep, she wondered how many orgasms she could get from the toy before it needed to be recharged again.

Sep 262022

Only Revolutions is a different kind of book. When you read the first page, you notice two columns of text. The text on the left is headlined by a historical date and then the rest of the column is a bunch of things that happened on that date, intermingled with parts of quotes about that day. The second column introduces one of the two characters in the book. Depending on which side of the book you started with, you are either reading about Sam, a 16 year old boy who has green eyes with flecks of gold, or you are reading about Hailey, a 16 year old girl who has gold eyes with flecks of green.

But the second column of text only reaches 4/5 of the way down to the bottom of the page. The rest of the column is made of words that are upside down. That part is the end of the other character. As the pages go on, the upside-down words take up more of the page as the part you are reading steadily shrinks.

There are other oddities. Sam’s story mentions a lot of animals in big bold font. Hailey’s story mentions plants. The letter ‘O’ is in a gold font. Both characters drive cars, but the cars change over time. They are followed by a CREEP who is typed in a purple font.

Did I mention the story is told in beat poetry?

So yeah, this is a challenging book to read. It is written by Mark Z. Danielewski, the write of House of Leaves. I was excited to read this book when I bought it eight years ago but the poetry was hard for me to read. I gave up after a few pages and put the book away. Over the years I would pick it up, read and give up again. Recently I came across it while unpacking and I decided that I should do what I always do when something challenges me and I looked up how to read it on the internet. The author had a video about how some people read it out loud and that other teenagers loved the book. I tried reading it out loud and CLICK, the book finally opened to me.

It is a great book. Sam and Hailey are telling their sides of the story, but it is not the same story. They experience things differently and it goes deeper than just their perspectives. In essence, these young people who are always 16, meet, fall in love, travel together and then watch the other die before succumbing themselves. Why they die is clear to me, but being poetry, I could be wrong.

Poetry is like that. I could summarize the story more and break down some of the themes, but that would only be my interpretation. This is a story full of symbols and strangeness right down to how you choose to read the pages and in what order. This story feels less like a story and more like a Rubik’s cube that changes meaning by how you engage with it.

It is a delightful piece of art. It is also very erotic in places that I feel captures the horny energy of youth in a way few books have. Not everyone is going to have the patience for it, but that is okay. For those of us who can enjoy it, it feels like a rare treasure we might not see the likes of ever again.

Sep 232022

Twin Moon Pictures Presents is a series of articles designed to give you things to use in horror games based in the 1970’s. Although the articles will be written for The They Came From Beyond the Grave RPG, the articles should be system neutral enough for your own 1970’s era games or stories.

It is 197-something. Something terrible is threatening your town, Senior Prom or summer camp. It is too early for alien trophy hunters and media-savvy ironic serial killers but too late for faceless blobs from outer space and tentacle monsters from racist pulp writers. You need something appropriate for the current times.

So, who or what is responsible for the current terror?

Roll a D10

1) Satanists – Oh yeah. Satan worshipers are everywhere. They are in your PTA, they are your elderly upstairs neighbors and they are DEFINITELY members of the church and clergy. You think they just want to knock up one lady with Satan’s son? There is a lot of demons out there and they all have cults trying to bring them to earth. Why, some Satanists might even be role-players!

2) Psychics- The 70’s were a bad time for psychics popping up and fucking shit up. Between the CIA’s drug programs, new additives in margarine or New Age Gurus messing with forces they don’t understand, psychics are manifesting their powers and lashing out. There might be a good psychic here or there, but for the most part, these bitter loners are mad as hell and they are not going to take it anymore.

3) Atlanteans – Some people say Atlantis was just a metaphor and never really existed. Those people are victims of the Atlanteans’ propaganda. Atlantis was real and it was up to no good when it sunk beneath the oceans. The survivors who escaped Atlantis tried to create new colonies and places of power in the ancient world but were (mostly) defeated by the forces of good. Some incredibly old Atlanteans live on, dreaming of bringing about a New World Order of magic, perversion and super-science. In some places, only their artifacts remain, waiting for foolish people to come across them once more and accidentally touch the wrong standing stone or mini-pyramid.

4) Cryptids – Do you have a lake nearby? What about a stretch of woods? Even an empty factory that has been abandoned? Then it probably has a Cryptid. Life always finds a way and in the pollution of the 1970’s life would often get really fucked up. If you are lucky, the local monster haunting your woods is just a Bigfoot but odds are if something weird is hanging about, it is a mutant freak that looks like a God was doing acid when he made it.

5) Masked Killer – Look, it might seem like a cliché but a cliché is just another word for “Stuff that happens a lot”. One thing we know about the 70’s is that psychopaths love masks and they have a lot of anger to get out. They might be back from the dead or they might just be a bitter jerk but either way, they really like to murder people.

6) Dracula – Dracula never dies, baby! Neither does his brides, children and sometimes casual enemies. Dracula has had a long life and if he can convert African Princes into vampires, then I am sure there are all sorts of vampires we have never heard of.

7) Ghosts – There are two kinds of ghosts. Some ghosts are friendly but strongly disagree on what temperature the thermostat is set to. The other kind of ghost is a bastard and would like you to kindly get out of its house, hopefully in pieces. Ghosts possess small children and seem to be really good at make sharp objects levitate. They don’t just haunt houses either! Sometimes they haunt objects and figuring which object needs to be doused in holy water can be the real challenge.

8) Communists – In the 60’s communists were making monsters to attack navy bases or building UFO’s to harass the Midwestern United States. In the 70’s, their methods are more subtle and sinister. Now they are replacing labor union workers with shapeshifters or mind-controlling teenagers with subliminal messages in their rock-and-roll. If something is trying to tear down society and they are using science to do it, it is probably communists.

9) Amazons – Almost as bad as Atlanteans, Amazons can have different origins. Some are descendants of the real Amazons of history, while others merely call themselves Amazons in their book club. Either way, these women are not satisfied with the unequal role of women in society and they would rather murder than protest. Some might form kill squads that massacre entire fraternities while other will turn to black magic to kill every male that wrote a nasty letter to the editor about Billie Jean King in their local town. Underestimate them at your peril.

10) Cult Leader- Different from Satanists in that they might not actually have magical powers. They could just be sadist narcissists who compel their followers to prove their loyalty with terrible acts of violence. Now a days, cult leaders run for office or demand movie studios release their cut of a flopped movie, but in the 70’s, cult leaders order mass murders and collected women to be cult leader’s brides. Cults don’t need to make sense or even have a higher purpose. They just need a bastard in charge and sycophants to follow them.

Sep 212022

Fucktoy sat naked in her chair, waiting to be used. The blindfold covered her eyes. One hand toyed pulled at a nipple while the other hand was at her cunt. Two fingers slid in and out of her wet sex.

The television turned off. Fucktoy let herself moan now that Master’s show was over. She hoped he was going to play with her, although that was never a guarantee. That was okay. At least Fucktoy could get herself off as long as she was on display.

The floorboards creaked. Master was moving towards her. Fucktoy gave her nipple one last pinch before moving her hand to rest on her thigh. Master always wanted unimpeded access to her breasts.

It was quiet. Where did Master go? Had he left her?

Fucktoy whimpered and stroked harder. It was his right to ignore her. The cruel indifference stabbed her heart with ice and flooded her cunt with lust.

The floorboards creaked again. Master was coming back!

A hand grabbed her hair. Fucktoy relaxed and prepared for her head to be savagely pulled. Instead, something tugged the ends of her hair.

It was a brush. This was new. What did it mean?

Master brushed her hair. He started at the ends and slowly moved up. The bristles gently touched her scalp.

Fucktoy’s pussy clenched. She plunged her fingers deeper.

Master continued to brush her hair. Was this a new interest of his? Would he style her hair into something different? Was this a prelude to something severe like cutting her hair?

Oh God, would he shave her head? While the blindfold was on and she was a Fucktoy, it would be his right. He could shave her bald and there wouldn’t be a damn thing she could about it.

Tremors gripped Fucktoy’s thighs. She almost came.

The brushing continued. The bristles of the brush massaged her scalp. The last time Master had used the brush it had been to spank her. The spanking been hard but this slow sense play was somehow more intense.

Fucktoy moaned. She was close to coming.

The brush moved away and two strong hands grabbed Fucktoy’s hair. Powerful fingers clenched and mussed her carefully tended hair. Unyielding arms pulled her forward and Fucktoy cried out as she fell from the chair. Cruel hands held her in place as she struggled to her knees.

Something hard pressed urgently against Fucktoy’s lips. She opened her lips and her Master’s cock claimed her mouth once more. Balls rested against her chin for only a moment before he fucked her face.

Fucktoy came seconds later on her frantic fingers.

Sep 192022

I haven’t played any role-playing games in a very long time. Part of it is that the games I am interested in rarely intersect the interests of my wife and friends. I like horror and most horror games that I like are about existential dread and doom. Games that were a little less doomy tended towards being shallow and I just couldn’t get into them. There is a popular genre of games that I call Supernatural Charmed which are more geared towards recreating CW style TV shows. I like those shows but I wouldn’t want to play in those worlds.

They Came From the Beyond the Grave is an rpg that goes in a different direction. It seeks to recreate 70’s Hammer Horror films with a dash of Roger Corman. The conceit is that every game is actually a movie that the characters are in. They get bonuses for acting in genre-appropriate ways like saying Quips, acting in a hammy fashion or adhering to movie logic. The plot and monsters lean towards witches, Dracula, mad scientists and the Devil Himself. There is something to be said for a game that says, “Fuck it, fight Dracula and Frankenstein’s Monster and Benjamin Franklin if you wanted.”

I think I have fallen in love with the game. Other systems have tried the meta-gaming route of recreating movies but they tend to go too far into the silliness. Since a lot of the powers come from cards, it would be very easy to toss out powers you don’t think are appropiate. This kind of flexibility allows you to handle anything from Little Shop of Horrors to Texas Chainsaw Massacre. The humor level is up to the players and it would not break this game to go full serious or full Elvira’s Haunted Hills.

Last night I played a game with my wife and it played out like an episode of Hammer House of Horror. My wife got in some great one-liners that aided her character. A piece of the set broke in a way that hampered the monster. It was thematically interesting and for us, extremely recognizable. It felt like something we could be watching on Shudder.

I do feel like the game might be a bit over-designed. The rule mechanics are straight forward, but there is a lot of extra stuff that can happen. My approach was to cut about 1/3 of the character generation for now and to make a list of which rules I wanted to worry about and which rules I will add later. This stripped down approach worked really well for us and it did not feel like we were missing anything.

On a personal note, it is a fun creative exercise to imagine what kind of horror movies a studio would make in the 1970’s. I decided that my studio was based in Wisconsin and would play on local legends and locals. Some sort of monster cow seems inevitable. I have spent too much time thinking about the history of the studio owner and what weird metaphysics he wants to make movies about. The game absolutely does not require you to do this kind of world building but the opportunity is too good to pass up. I am looking forward to what stories Twin Moon Pictures will be creating in the months to come.

If 50’s science fiction is more your thing, Onyx Publishing uses the same mechanics for a game called They Came From Beneath the Sea! If you prefer your horror to be more slasher oriented, there is a supplement for the base game of Beyond the Grave called, They Came From Camp Murder Lake. I have all three books and they are great reads, as well as being compatible with each other.

Aug 222022

Here is the introduction to my new book, Nymphopocalypse: Escape the Office Building! This sets up the book and gives you hints about the perils you will face.

Purple Skies

“Holy shit!” Juan yells. “Did you see her?”

“Not at all,” you say, keeping your eyes on the road. Traffic in Beaverton was usually pretty mild but this morning has been crazy. Every driver has been sloppy today and you have passed three accidents so far. It is like everyone is drunk or hungover.

“I can’t believe you missed her, Cory,” Juan says. “Some blonde lady was standing on the sidewalk with her skirt hiked up. She had her panties around her knees and was rubbing one out right there on the street!”

“Bullshit,” you say. Your eyes dart to the rearview mirror but you have driven too far to see her.

“Swear to Jesus,” Juan says. “Nancy is going to freak when I tell her!”

Nancy is Juan’s boss at the gun store. She is something of a doomsday prepper; believing that one day the world will collapse in a carnal orgy called the Nymphopocalypse. You looked it up online but other than one crazy sex blogger, you didn’t see anyone else talking about it.

You turn the car at an intersection and head down College Avenue. The four-lane road here gives you a clear view of the morning sky. It was almost entirely purple.

“Whoa,” you and Juan say together. The purple reminded you of hard cocks and nipples freshly bitten.

“The weather guy said the purple skies come from a shifting in polar winds,” you say. “It has something to do with the ice caps melting and releasing ancient gasses into the sky.”

“Bullshit,” Juan said. “It’s fallout from that satellite the Russians blew up last week. My mom sent me a link on Facebook about it.”

“Either way, Nancy is going to freak,” you tell Juan. “I bet you guys will be doing basement drills.”

“I hate that shit,” Juan says. “Oh, that reminds me, Nancy said you can use the basement bunker when the Nymphopocalypse happens.”

“No shit?” you say. “I’m kind of honored. I know that is a short list.”

“Yeah, she likes that you work as a cook,” Juan said. “She said that means you have useful skills and know how to take orders.”

You laugh and then spot something coming from the right. It is a naked man wearing tennis shoes. His dick is hard and swinging between his legs like a hammer. You slam on the brakes and narrowly miss hitting the man.

The naked man never sees you as he keeps running. You and Juan watch him turn down an alley. A horn honks behind you.

“Holy shit,” you say.

“Think he knows the chick jilling herself on the road?” Juan asks.

The horn honks again behind you. It is a long, angry sound that lasts for a full ten seconds.

You look in the mirror. It is a black woman driver. She is breathing hard as she slams on the horn.

“Fuck off!” Juan yells, flicking her off.

You drive quickly, not looking to incite any road rage. Weirdly, the lady behind you stays where she is in the middle of the road. Other cars are honking at her now. What the fuck is her problem?

“People have lost their damn mind,” Juan says.

You turn onto Wisconsin and pull into a parking spot in front of Nancy’s Guns, Ammo and Supplies. Juan grabs his lunch bag and hops out of the car. Before he closes the door, he leans back in.

“I’ll call if Nancy has me stay late,” Juan says. “She gets antsy when weird shit happens like this.” He pointed up at the purple sky. “And remember, if the world does end today, Cory, you get your ass over here. I don’t want to be locked in a bunker alone with just Nancy. If it is just us, we might end up fucking.”

“I doubt that will happen,” you say. Nancy is attractive for her age, but she is a bit on the paranoid crazy side. “But if the world does end, I’ll be right over.”

“I’m holding you to it,” Juan says as he closes the door.

You get ready to join the traffic. A postman is on the side of the road, leaning against a light pole. He is hunched over, kneading his thighs. The guy looks like he is having a panic attack. You are tempted to stop but you see a woman approach him and touch his shoulder.

The two start kissing. Wow, they are kissing each other pretty hard. Both of them grab each other passionately as they devour each other’s mouths. He’s opening her shirt while she grabs the bulge in his pants.

Huh, they must know each other.

The traffic clears and you get back on the road. Your cock is hard as a rock inside your pants. When was the last time you got kissed like that? Shit, have you ever been kissed like that?

A block later, you turn onto Richmond Avenue and drive down to the Michaels building. You pull into the parking garage next door and park your car. As you get out of your car, you wonder about you weird shit you have seen so far today.

The SUV next to your parked car starts to rock. There is steam on the windows. Faint moans come from inside.

Damn, is everyone hooking up this morning?

You head out of the parking garage and into the Michaels building. None of the stores on the first floor are open yet. In fact, some of them still have their lights off and don’t have anyone in them. You check your watch to make sure you are not early, but no, you’re right on time. Some people must be staying home today.

“Or they got stuck in the weird traffic,” you say to yourself.

A woman is waiting for the elevator. A tight pair of slacks frame a round ass. You stare so hard at her ass that you almost trip over your own feet. Luckily, the woman is too engrossed in her phone to notice your clumsiness.

You tear your eyes away from her ass and look at the elevator door as you stand beside her. The numbers on the elevator panel slowly click downwards. In your corner of your eye, you can see a hint of deep cleavage. You resist the urge to get a better look.

The doors mercifully open. You rush in and hit the button for the top floor. The woman walks in, clicks the button for the fourth floor and then stands at the opposite side of the elevator. She is still staring at her phone. The doors close and you start to ascend.

You can’t help yourself. Trying to look bored, you pretend to let your eyes wonder. You see that the woman is Asian, most likely Vietnamese with the population that lives around here. Large brown eyes highlight a cute face. Bright pink lipstick reminds you of bubblegum. Her black hair is pulled into a professional ponytail. The top buttons on her blouse are undone and you get a good view of the white bra barely holding her large breasts.

Damn, those tits are as nice as her ass. You would love to bury your face in them. Or maybe hold her breasts in your hand as you fuck her hard enough to make her ponytail snap.

A bit of drool escapes your lips and dribbles down your chin. What the fuck is wrong with you? Embarrassed, you quickly wipe your chin and pray the woman didn’t notice.

The woman licks her lips. You realize her eyes are no longer on her phone. They are staring at your crotch.

Shit, your dick is forming a giant tent in your pants. You turn away from her view and towards the door. Your cock pulses wildly inside your pants.

The elevator stops. The curvy woman sighs and puts away her phone. She goes out but lingers at the doors. You stare at her large ass and wonder why she is waiting.

The doors start to close and the woman leaves. She looks over her shoulder and gives you a final look. No, she gave your crotch one last look.

This has been the weirdest commute to work. You let out a deep breathe, grateful that you are alone in the elevator.

“Come on, Cory,” you tell yourself. “Get your shit together before someone at work sees you.

The elevator dings. It is time for you to get off.

Go To Work.

Aug 172022

My latest interactive smut book, Escape the Office Building is available for purchase from Amazon. This is the first book in the Nymphopocalypse series and this kicks off the weird sexy apocalypse story I have been kicking around in my head for too long.

What is the Nymphopocalypse? Well, it is a bitch to spell, I’ll tell you that. It is also a mysterious event where people turn into mindless sex freaks with incredible strength, endurance and a terrible urge to indulge their sexual desires. If one of them fucks you, then you become one of them. They are like zombies except A) alive because necrophillia would be icky and B) they act on their desires according to individual preferences, which is how you get some nymphos who are content to just jack off and watch.

In this book, you play Cory, a cook who works at a restaurant on the top floor of an office building. The Nymphopocalypse breaks out and he knows of a safe place to hide down the street. Getting out of the restaurant and then out of the office building as well as down the street is going to be tricky. Lucky for him, he has a knife and YOU to guide him on his way. Succeed and you get laid at the safe house along with anyone you rescue along the way. Fail and well, you still get laid but as a mindless Nympho.

I hope you enjoy this mix of horror and survivalist erotica.

Aug 152022

The Final Girl Support Group is a novel by Grady Hendrix. Actually, it is more like a fast moving spear tearing through characters, plot and locations. This book is the definition of fast-paced and I found it awfully hard to put down.

The plot concerns a group of women who are all survivors of slasher massacres. Psychopaths murdered their friend and family and in some cases, the killers or their stand-ins, came back for another swing at the survivor. These women have seen some shit and it fucked them up. They are part of a support group where they should be looking out for one another but familiarity has bred contempt and now they are on the verge of breaking up.

Until one of them gets killed. Oh shit.

The book does something interesting in that it imagines a world where there are both the slasher killers of Michael Myers and Jason, but also moves are created after the massacres to cash in on the horrible events. The final girls exist both as victims of horrible crimes, but also public figures where most people know exactly what happened to them. It is a fascinating comment on how society eats women up and then cannibalizes their tragedy for mass consumption and profit.

In fact, this book hit me in a very vulnerable way. The exploitation of the final girls by their loved ones, friends, the media and others is a big part of the book. It reminded me a lot of stories about child actors and how their lives get defined for them at a super young age and then the people who are supposed to look out for them use them for their own gain. Some readers might have a harder time with that than the brutal killers.

Speaking of which, this is not a book that cares much about the killers. They are there, but this story isn’t about them. After years of serial killer television shows, it is a welcome change.

All in all, I loved this book and would recommend it to any slasher fan.

Aug 122022

I have been thinking about treasure.

I am currently doing the final edits to my next interactive book. At this point it is just rooting out typos and adding missing words. I no longer have to hold multiple timelines in my head or important facts like what color panties a character wears. As the editing continues, I feel my brain slowly let go of the old story and new ideas are creeping.

Weirdly, the new ideas are about what one finds when they poke around an ancient spaceship.

When I was a kid, my absolute favorite part of playing Dungeons and Dragons was rolling up random treasure. My group didn’t quite understand that the Dungeon Master should determine the treasure ahead of time so maybe the monsters could use them. No, our dumb asses thought that the players got to roll for treasure after the monster were defeated. It was an open social thing where we cheered and groaned as the dice determined that we had one potion of healing, one rope of climbing and four thousand gold pieces.

I don’t play role-playing games anymore but I have been thinking about those treasure tables. My tastes are certainly more adult now and I prefer science fiction to fantasy these days. I also care less for powerful weapons than I do for say, a pornographic miniature. Part of me is constructing the lost civilization that created these items while another part of me is wondering if it is more fun to find a part of a sex robot and it is to find an entire sex robot.

A small tiny part if me is screaming that there is no market for a document about lost sex toys from a hedonistic space-faring civilization but I got to tell you, that tiny part is a fun-ruiner and should not be listened to. Now that the idea if lodged in my head, I feel like I should at least give it a try.

My initial thoughts is that whatever I do produce will be system agnostic, so a reader could plug it into their own tabletop role-playing game. I also want the treasure to cover a range of tastes and not just be a cis-male wishlist. Cripes, do I dare take the plunge and get illustrations?

Either way, this should be a fun side project until I decide to get cracking on the sequel to the book I’m editing.

Aug 082022
What part of this woman is little?

Little Ego has the strangest dreams. They start off simple enough, maybe a present has arrived or she is taking a bath. But soon the present opens to reveal flowers that move on their own or the bath tub is shared with a crocodile. There is a hint of danger before the flowers begin to kiss in intimate places or the crocodile mounts Little Ego and she is brought to the heights of passion . . .

Which is when Little Ego wakes up. The bed is in disarray, Little Ego’s clothes are missing and there might be a nearby object that explains why she dreamed of such oddities. Little Ego makes one last comment about what her shrink will think and then the scene ends.

When I first encountered the stories of Little Ego by Vittorio Giardino, I thought they were fantastic flights of fancy. I loved the surreal nature of the dreams and the incredible leaps of imagination. Also very enjoyable is Giardino’s art of these exotic woman from some mystical place.

As an adult, I now know this exotic place was Europe, and that the stories were inspired by a children’s comic called Little Nemo by Winsor McCay. This is in fact a porn parody, right down to the character’s name.

But it is still luscious and gorgeous to look at. As a writer of porn parodies myself, I am in awe in how Giardino created something derivative but so damn sensuous. Dreams allow for impossible fantasies like an orgy with multiples of yourself, or making love with a pilot on the wing of a plane. Little Nemo has an idea is too precious to confine only to children’s stories.

And I also wonder how many fans of Little Ego admire the stories, the art and the sexuality without ever discovering the original? Is something a parody when it references something the viewer has no idea of? It shows how art evolves and creates, sometimes carrying a baton from a creator people might never know.