Oct 162013

suckubeth2clr“Greetings mortals! It is me, Suckubeth, the abomination with tits a raging. With me as always is my Flaming-Skull-on-a-Stick companion, Burny.”

“Oh no! Suckubeth is in color now! The October moon has opened the way for her to invade your world! Run mortals!”

“Yes, run right into my open thighs. Today’s story is a terrifying tale made all the more horrible by the fact that it is a true story. It is called The Exorcism of Jennifer Callahan.”

“You can’t tell them that one! It is based on true events which means it could happen to the readers! And when a horror story says that it is based on true events, they never ever lie!”

“That’s right, Burny. There were witnesses and documents signed by notaries. It is absolutely true.”

“Read on, mortals.”


Ezekiel knocked on the door and noticed that wood was cold; much colder than you would expect even for a night in October. It was a frosty cold. It was the kind of cold that shrivels your nuts. He knew he was at the right house.

The door opened and a frightened man looked out. The worry lines in his face softened when he saw Ezekiel. He held the door open and shook Ezekiel’s hand.

“Oh thank you, Father,” he said. “I am so glad the church took me seriously.”

“I am not a Father or a member of the Catholic church,” Ezekiel said. “My name is Reverend Ezekiel Bone and I was told by Father O’Malley that you had a problem I could help with.”

The man nodded his head. “Yes, Reverend,” he said. “My name is Michael Callahan and my wife, Jennifer, has been acting strange the past two weeks.”

“Hmm,” Ezekiel said. He looked around the living room that he was in. A group of adult magazines on the coffee table had defaced covers where someone had inked out all trace of skin on the women. A broken paddle hung from the wall. A chair with leather restraints looked like it had been set on fire.

“I take it that I am standing in the house of people who practice BONDAGE, read PORNOGRAPHY and like to spank NAKED FLESH?” Ezekiel boomed.

“Oh, yes, Reverend,” Michael said. “Normally I would clean up but I have been so busy. Is that a problem?”

“Hell no, Brother!” Reverend Ezekiel said. “The Good Lord gave us bodies and I am glad to be in the house that celebrates God’s divine plan! Give me an AMEN!”

“Amen!” Michael said, visibly relieved.

Ezekiel put his hand on Michael’s shoulder. “Tell me Brother, has your wife suddenly had no appetite for earthly pleasures?”

“Yes, Reverend!” Michael said. “She wouldn’t even go to the swinger’s party last night and she helped organize it!”

“Tell me, Brother, has your wife started speaking in unusual tongues?”

“Yes, Reverend!” Michael said. “Every time I try to jack off, she starts babbling in these creepy voices about venereal diseases!”

Ezekiel shook his head. “Finally Brother, has your wife’s pussy gone cold?”

“Hell yeah!” Michael said. “It is like sticking your willy into a freezer!”

Ezekiel shut his eyes. “Oh LORD! Give me the strength to help this poor accursed woman! Help your humble servant as he does battle with the DEMON that has possessed this good Christian woman! AMEN!”

“Did you say demon?” Michael said.

“Yes, Brother but take heart,” Ezekiel said. “This isn’t my first exorcism. It is time you took me to your wife.”

Michael nodded and led Ezekiel upstairs. They passed by photos of the couple in happier times. Pictures of their wedding, pictures of their first wife swap and pictures of their fetish costumes attested to the love this couple had.

Ezekiel stepped into the bedroom where the wife laid. She was a beautiful woman with black hair that was pulled into a sexless bun. She was clothed head to toe in an ugly white nightgown. Her legs were crossed at the ankles.

“Who’s the shitwit with the limp dick?” Jennifer asked.

Ezekiel drew in his breath. The air was chilly and cold. He lifted his cross and held it before him.

“Out DEMON! Out of this good woman’s PUSSY and back to the frozen pits of HELL!”

Jennifer laughed. Her voice was unnaturally deep. “Fuck you, Reverend! This bitch’s soul is mine and she will never get laid again!”

“Wrong, Shit-stain of SATAN!” Ezekiel said. He reached into his pocket and pulled out a vial of water.

“Is that holy water?” Michael asked.

“Better,” Ezekiel said. “It’s juice from a nun’s pussy.”

He opened the vial and flung the water at Jennifer. She howled as the water soaked her night gown. Smoke rose from the gown and burned off her body, leaving her flesh unharmed.

Ezekiel gasped at the beautiful body that was revealed. Lovely firm breasts, perky nipples, wide hips and a hint of pubic hair were revealed. Sadly, her legs were still closed.

“Leave now Reverend!” Jennifer howled. “Leave now before I make your dick fall off and your balls turn blue!”

Ezekiel took a step forward. He took out his Bible, the special one that includes the Purple Book of Mary and the Orgy of Solomon. He read straight from his holy book even though he knew the words by heart.

“Yea though I fuck the meanest of bitches, I shall fear no dry cunt,” he said.

Jennifer screamed and Michael’s underwear caught fire. He tore off his pants and beat the flames out. Ezekiel kept reading.

“For the Lord gives me my cock and he has taught me the motion of the ocean,” he read.

Jennifer screamed again and the room grew even colder. Ezekiel felt his balls shrinking into his body but he kept reading.

“The Lord guides my hips and he tells me the words that all women like to hear.”

Jennifer screeched again but now there was fear in her scream. Her ankles uncrossed and her legs slowly parted. She kept screaming as her legs opened into an impressive split.

“Fuck you, Reverend!” Jennifer howled. She waved her hand the Bible flew from Ezekiel’s hands. She waved her hand again and a phantom foot kicked him in the nuts.

Ezekiel grunted but he took another step forward. He also loosened his belt and his pants feel to the ground. He was wearing no underwear since it was a Sunday. His cock was hard and rigid with the Lord’s glory.

He approached Jennifer’s possessed body. He grabbed her by her spread thighs and guided his cock to her demonic pussy.

It was like thrusting inside a cube of ice. Ezekiel winced but he kept pushing until he was inside the poor woman.

“Try to keep an erection in that!” the thing in Jennifer screamed.

“I command you, frigid spirit, whoever you are, along with all your minions now attacking this servant of GOD, by the mysteries of the First Fuck, the Last Orgy, the Prophet Gangbang and the Final climax of our LORD JESUS CHRIST, by the COCK of the Holy Spirit, by the coming of our Lord for judgment, that you tell me by some sign your name, and the day and hour of your departure!”

Jennifer’s pussy began to thaw. The ice turned to warm juices and Ezekiel moaned. Heat returned to the sacred place between her thighs.

“Noooo!” a voice cried out within Jennifer. “My name is Ver the Castrator! And I will never leave this body!”

Ezekiel began to thrust. “Hear me, Jennifer! The LORD is all powerful but you need to help yourself! Fight, Jennifer! Fight against this beast!”

Jennifer shook as Ezekiel fucked her. Slowly, so very slowly, her hands lifted and cupped her breasts. She pinched her nipples.

“Hallelujah!” Ezekiel cried. “Michael, your wife is strong but she needs your help! Get over here and put your cock in her!”

Michael rushed to his wife. He thought about it for a split second before getting near her face. He guided his cock to her mouth and she opened for him. He slid inside her mouth and thanked the Lord because it had been a full month since his last blowjob.

Ezekiel kept fucking Jennifer’s pussy. Michael fucked his wife’s mouth. The demon inside Jennifer kept screaming but mostly it was gagged by Michael’s cock.

Ezekiel looked down at the possessed pussy he was fucking and recited more words.

“Depart, then, transgressor! DEPART, spirit of prudishness, full of insults and nut kicks, foe of pleasure, persecutor of the debauched! Give place, abominable creature, give way, you monster, give way to CHRIST, in whom you found none of your works. For he has already opened your THIGHS and warmed your PUSSY, fingered your ASS and sucked your TONGUE. He has cast you forth into the outer darkness, where everlasting abstinence awaits you and your abettors!”

Ezekiel felt Jennifer’s pussy tighten down around his cock. He saw Jennifer’s lips cave in around Michael’s cock. He heard the desperate howl of the demon beast as it was driven out.

Michael cried out as he climaxed. Jennifer swallowed all of him and kissed his wilting cock.

Ezekiel kept fucking and Jennifer met him thrust for thrust. She thanked Jesus, Mary, God and all the vibrators as she came as well.

Ezekiel climaxed last and he gave out a loud, “HALLELUJAH!”


“I am so relieved it had a happy ending. Any ending that ends with a threesome is a happy ending.”

“I do worry about the psychological trauma of being possessed by a frigid spirit. Do you think there is a support group for them?”

“Of course, Burny. It is called a gangbang and I highly recommend it. In fact, if you haven’t been possessed by a demon of frigidity, I still recommend a gangbang. Preventive medicine is the best medicine.”

“I am a little skeptical of that advice. Are you a doctor?”

“No, but I have had many doctors inside me and three out of three doctors’ souls agree that I am always right.”

“That is all for now mortals, I’ll catch your souls later.”

*Depiction of Suckubeth provided by thrice cursed, Joe Gravel*

  2 Responses to “Fiction: The Exorcism of Jennifer Callahan”

  1. A priest with less confidence would bring a ring gag if he’s going to be doing that any more. :)


    • This is the kind of thing that happens when I see multiple exorcism themed movies in a row.

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