Nov 162012

Some people don’t want a therapist.  They don’t need to explore their inner feelings and they sure as fuck don’t want to talk about fathers.  There is a stigma to therapy and some people can’t accept that they need medical help to become a better person.

The Life Coach industry recognizes this.  They help people with their lives by reskinning the therapy process with the sports coach model.  Every one has seen the movie where the inspirational coach helps the normal guy become a super athlete.  People understand this fantasy trip and they are more than willing to enter into a student-mentor relationship than they are a patient-doctor relationship.  On paper it might be the same thing but it is all about how you present it.

Life coaches don’t ask questions as much as they make demands.  They are part cheerleader and part drill sergeant.  They don’t talk about your mother; they talk about how much ass you are on the verge of kicking.  They don’t put the focus on your past as much as they focus on how you are making the future better. 

As you might guess, life coaches are completely free of getting any sort of therapist or medical license.  This might be why a large number of life coaches spend a great deal of time making their money by telling people how they can become life coaches.  One might suspect that it is some sort of self replicating scam.  I bet it is like most things in that it depends on who is doing it.

Meet Veronica Umaria.  She is a second generation Japanese-American.  Her appearance gives her that exotic touch that people want in a life coach while her completely American upbringing makes her very approachable.  Veronica is a Sex Life Coach and she is very good at her job.

Need to spice up your marriage?  Veronica will provide hands on advice and training. 

Single and frustrated?  Veronica won’t offer any dating advice but she will teach you twenty different ways to masturbate that will spoil you for human contact.

In the middle of a hot night of lovemaking and suddenly things turn cold?  Veronica will take your call in the middle of the night and help with your problem.  Shit, she might just do a house call.

Need to grudge fuck someone for personal petty reasons?  Veronica has a nine step regimen that will get you into grudge fucking shape.

You might look at these list of services and conclude that Veronica is some sort of super sex therapist.  Remember, it is all in the delivery.

“Now Carlos, you might think you have a small penis but I want you to think of that penis as a stiletto of sex.  That is not a pencil dick, it is a precise instrument of pleasure.  You’re going to learn how to use your tool to get into places women never knew they had.”


“Geena, you can fuck yourself better than that.  Pound that pussy!  You spent money on a dildo worthy of a pussy and you’re using it like it a virgin.  Get in there!  Remember your training!  Fuck, fuck FUCK! You’re worth it!”

At this point you might be thinking of Veronica as a sort of dominatrix.  You’re close.  She will give you structure and a sense of order but she isn’t spanking you, she isn’t there to turn you on and she is not going to punish you if you are bad.  If you don’t follow her training then you fail yourself and Veronica will be happy to point that out to you.

Play With This is a series of articles designed to give you things to play around with in your writing.  Feel free to borrow, modify, or completely change for your own stories.  

  2 Responses to “Play With This: Sex Coach”

  1. I don’t know, having someone order you around could be a turn on. Not to mention I would see her having a problem with closet exhibitionists.

    It also reminded me of this: which is just awesome.

  2. t’Sade – The Sex Coach is the kind of character I could see starring in her own weird little anthology of stories. They just wouldn’t be stories I could write :)

    I swear sometimes that Oglaf and I were seperated at birth.

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