Nov 022012

Today’s Play With This is provided by the supra-creative Joe Tortuga.

There’s probably no bigger downer at an orgy when everyone is all entangled together, and about to do something nasty to one or more other people, and discovering that some important supply is missing or out of reach.  The condoms are out, but there are more beside the guest bed nightstand.  The lube bottle rolled away and is now in the closet. The special blank and white feels-like-real-skin double dildo is still in the dishwasher since the last orgy.

All of these things, I must be honest, happened to me.  But then I discovered Sex Butlers, Inc.  I now have them at every function that I can (sometimes there’s no time to call ahead, alas).  They provide a simple service: someone trained in Sex Butlery will attend your event.  That persons’ job, as any good butlers’ is to pay attention and be ready.

When it is time for a condom, and you are search the floor or bed next to you, the Sex Butler will drop one in your hand.  When the lube rolls away to corners unknown, the Sex Butler will be there to gently nudge it back into place.  They’ll be sure to place any necessary equipment near you, be it dildos, rope, ice, matches, crops or handcuffs. For a fee the Sex Butler themselves will bring a case of esoteric equipment your orgy-goers could make use of, all of it properly cleaned, and sanitary, of course.

Like all good butlers, Sex Butlers are there, but they aren’t part of what is going on.  They buttle, but don’t butt-in. This is the key to their success, and their usefulness at your party.  Unlike traditional butlers, who are almost exclusively men, Sex Butlers come in all genders, shapes, sizes and ethnicities. The temperament to be a Sex Butler is rare, and is thus encouraged wherever it is found.  Sex Butlers, Inc provides no “sex maids” although they do sell branded outfits for the adventurous role-player.

So, how do you use this in a story? Surely the Sex Butlers have seen everything, and could perhaps tell you some of what they’ve seen.  Also, who trains a Sex Butler, and what is that like? Are they asexual or hyper-sexual beings? What’s a Sex Butler party like.  I mean, other than incredibly organized?

  2 Responses to “Play With This: Sex Butlers”

  1. The Sex Butlers have been on my mind since I basically was one for a nice afternoon after an orgy broke out (as they do) in my den.

    But I’ve never quite figured out what to do with them. Maybe someone else will

  2. Thanks for being the 1st Play With This contributor!

    Seriously though, I need to spend more time in your den.

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