“Gentlemen, give your special lady the gift that will last a lifetime this Christmas. Buy her the new Von Madd Everlasting-ClitRocket Vibrator today. The plutonium battery and state of the art vibration engine will ensures that this gift will last long enough to pass down to your grandchildren.”
Damn…I didn’t get ANYTHING in my stocking, let alone one of those.
Being the mom sucks.