Jun 092006

Hello is this Mr. Richards?

Hello sir, I’m calling on behalf of Frustrated Housewives. Mr. Richards, every year millions of housewives go without the level of sex they require to be happy. Sometimes this is because of lazy husbands, asshole husbands and often times, very clueless husbands. These Frustrated Housewives become fed up with being rejected and turn to other sources of fulfillment like compulsive cleaning, writing Amazon book reviews and blogging. Mr. Richards, how much free time can you contribute to fucking a frustrated housewife?

Two hours a day? My my, Mr. Richards. That is very generous of you. On behalf of Frustrated Housewives in your area, I would like to thank you for donating this time to fucking those in need.

Do you have any specialties that may help us select which Frustrated Housewife you are most capable of helping?

Spanking? That’s good.

Bondage? very good.

Anal? No, no Mr. Richards, that is not a minus. In fact, that is the number one requested act. Yes, really. Husbands can be stupid sometimes.

Very well Mr. Richards, I would like to thank you once again for volunteering to help those in need. The Frustrated Housewives really appreciate this and as a bonus for your donation, the Housewife will be bringing over dinner.

If you will just stay on the line, my manager will confirm your address and a Frustrated Housewife in your area will arrive shortly. Thank you for your generous donation.

  11 Responses to “Fiction: Charity”

  1. err…what about frustrated single moms?

    Are you willing to donate your time to them too?

  2. Madame X, I will happily anwser that charity call when it comes. How does two hours on Friday sound to you?

  3. I laugh right now…because in so many ways that would be perfect. ;)Glad to see you are such a contributor Shon.


  4. Now if I knew I’d be getting telemarketing calls like that, I might answer my phone on occasion!

  5. This is the best idea I’ve heard in weeks.

    SIGN ME UP!!!!!


    (Thanks, Shon)

  6. What about horny sluts who can’t get enough, are we not worthy of your charitable donations?

    Come on Mr Richards, dig deep.

  7. Very nicely written and highly amusing.

    Now is there a service for nympho’s? ;)

  8. Vixxxen- I’m a giver, I just am :)

    Damnations- I get so many calls, I recognize them by their number now. I can recite their scripts.

    AAG- I am here to help :)

    Tess- Those are on Tuesdays.

    Suze- All day Sunday :)

  9. Sounds like you’ll have your hands full and be well fed too :)


  10. Shon,

    You’re a freaking philanthropist!

    I applaud your kind generosity.


  11. The girlfriend- And yet here I am, eating a nutrigrain bar for breakfast, sigh :)

    Bonnie- I try not to brag, but I’m always thinking of those in sexual need.

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