Sep 302009
 

Charles rubbed his eyes and headed for the door. The knocking would not go away. For fuck’s sake, it was noon. The mindless sheep of the world might adhere to a diurnal schedule but Charles was a free thinker. He liked his breakfast at 3 in the afternoon and his dinner sometime around dawn.

He ripped open the door and whatever lecture he was about to let loose with died in his throat. It was a woman. It was a hot woman. She had black hair and intelligent green eyes. She was wearing a trench coat that went down to her feet. It was the kind of coat that strippers and mistresses wore right before they revealed they were wearing nothing underneath.

“GrokSmacker?” she asked.

Charles blinked. It was his online handle. It sounded weird to hear it out loud.

“Uh, yes,” he said tentatively. Oh shit. Who knew that he was Groksmacker? Was this FBI? Was she here to bust him for his Japanese porn bit torrent work?

“Diana Moon,” she said. She pointed to a pin on her collar. It was a small purple hand. “Do you understand the significance of this?”

Charles nodded. He was wide awake now. The Purple Hand! They were the most secretive organization of sexual freedom fighters he had ever heard of. He had done a small amount of coding for them.

“Good,” Diana said. “You have just been activated. The Purple Hand needs your help.”

“Ah,” he said dumbly. “Come in.”

He stepped aside as she swept into his apartment. Man, he wished he had cleaned up. Books and magazines were stacked everywhere. He had two bags of garbage sitting by the door that he always forgot to take out. Shit, there was three separate Chinese dinner boxes by the door alone.

Diana surveyed the room and nodded in approval. “Dark, that’s good,” she said. “No one will notice if we keep the shades closed while I am here.”

“You’re staying here?” Charles asked. He knew so little about the Purple Hand. Rumors had it that they blanketed an entire county in condoms after the local government outlawed sex education. Rumors also said that they were responsibly for exposing the kinky affairs of certain anti-pornography televangelists. These guys were totally illegal.

Diana pulled out a small object. Charles recognized it as a zip drive.

“I pulled this from the headquarters of Comview Cable,” she said. “It is a military grade anti-porn spyware program. It goes live in two weeks. It will report anyone who downloads porn to a single database that can be used by law authorities.”

“Damn,” Charles said. A normal person would have talked how illegal such a program was and how any cable company that used it would be sued. Charles knew better. He knew about the secret prisons under Fort Lauderdale and about the national plan to protect every Wal-Mart in the country if the event of martial law. Charles’s ex-girlfriend called him a conspiracy nut. Charles liked to think of it as being fucking observant.

“The only problem is that it is encoded,” Diana said. “The network says that you are the best person to crack it. You have eleven days to crack the code so we can begin counter-measures.”

“Whoa!” Charles said. “Look, I don’t mind helping you guys download porn, or cracking copyright protections, but this is seriously illegal. We get caught with this, and I could lose my job and end up in prison.”

Diana nodded. “I am here to encourage you.

She opened her trench coat. She was almost nude. Her large breasts were bare. A thick patch of pubic hair covered her sex. The only thing she was wearing were fishnet stockings over her long legs.

Charles swallowed. Fishnet stockings! The Purple Hand did know everything. Well, at least everything about him.

He reached out to touch the top of her fishnet stocking. He wanted to feel where the band met her thigh. Just one little tug is all he wanted.

“No,” Diana said. “Not now. When you break the encryption and we have the program to analyze, then you can have me.”

She dropped the trench coat. It was only when she was standing before him that he noticed she had a gun. Charles pointed at it, not quite able to speak.

“This?” she said, holding the gun up. “This is in case the Comview Cable people find us before you break the code.”

Charles smiled. “Let’s get started then.”

Two days went by. Diana wasn’t kidding when she said she was staying. She cleared out some space in his computer room and made a pallet on the floor. That is where she slept when he would reluctantly go to sleep. While he worked, she would sit there and read through some of his old role-playing books.

He asked her is she ever played. She shrugged and didn’t answer. When she read through his Top Secret rulebook, she often broke out into near hysterical laughter.

The distracting thing is, she never did put anything else on. She walked around the apartment in those fishnets. She must have had other pairs stored away in the trench coat because he never saw a snag. The stockings were always tight and too damn sexy on her long legs. Fuck, it was hard to think when she was around.

It was harder not to work with her around either. After three hours of working on the code he was about ready to give up. He turned in his chair to rub his eyes and saw Diana sitting on his floor. Her long legs were spread wide open. The fishnet stockings were like a wicked runway to the promised paradise of her sex. He turned back around in his seat and kept working.

Diana would order them food. She would put the trench coat back on when the delivery people arrived. Charles started to get an erection every time the door knocked. The sight of her putting her coat back on was always disappointing, but it just meant that he would get to enjoy the sight of her disrobing all over again. The shedding of the coat to reveal her fishnets all over again almost drove him over the edge.

The first night she was there, Charles tried to masturbate. When he was in bed and she was sleeping on the floor, he tried to jack off. He got in three strokes before the bed shook from a powerful kick.

“Not till you crack the code,” Diana said.

Charles moaned. You don’t argue with a woman who has a gun. And you don’t fuck with a woman who keeps wearing those fishnets.

On the third day, Charles began to despair. The encryption was out of his league. He had cracked codes for fun before but this was serious. His usual tricks weren’t working and he was having a hard time concentrating.

Diana stood by him. His fishnet covered thighs were touching his arm. He was too afraid to move his shoulder. This might be the closest he was ever going to get.

“You tried really hard,” Diana said. “You can have one toe.”

Charles knew he should take the offer. His chances of cracking the code were pretty remote. He couldn’t though. He could accept failure at this point. After staring at her legs for three day, he couldn’t quit.

“Order some pizza tonight, please,” he said. “It’s easier to eat while I work.”

On the fourth day, Charles worked fourteen hours straight. He never worked a paying job that hard. He never even played Everquest that long. When he finally stumbled to bed, didn’t even pull the covers on top of him.

Diana sat down on his bed. She patted her lap. Charles said nothing as he placed his head on her fishnet thighs. The delicate net felt good against his facial hair. Her thighs were so firm and wonderful.

“You can have three toes,” Diana said. “You did your best.”

Charles sighed. “No,” he whispered.

Diana stroked his hair while he slept.

On the fifth day, he almost had it. He realized they were using a German code he had seen before. Charles’ fingers were shaking as he ran the code-breaking program.

Diana was on the floor beside him. She was on her back, and had her legs up in the air, resting them against the desk. The fishnet covered toes wiggled from time to time. She was reading his Dungeons and Dragons 2nd edition Player’s Handbook.

The code didn’t work. It just produced longer and longer lines of gibberish. Charles groaned in disappointment.

“Four toes,” Diana said. She wiggled them.

Charles ignored her.

On the sixth day, he had a breakthrough. It was a German code, but with a Russian variation. Emotionally exhausted, it was the simplest thing to run the decryption program. He watched it run silently for five minutes before it spewed out the evil Comview Cable program.

He just looked at it and let out a breath of relief. He wasn’t surprised to notice Diana was standing beside him. He hadn’t heard her move. He could feel her hand in his hair though.

“Come to bed,” Diana said. “You’ve earned it.”

He sobbed a little. He had earned it. The tension of the last few days broke inside him. He had won. Tears flowed like cheap soda down his cheeks. He hadn’t cried since they cancelled Firefly but he was crying hard now.

“Come,” Diana urged. “Come to bed my brilliant man. Come and suck all ten of my toes through fishnet holes. Kiss my ankles as much as you want. Place your cock between my feet and come as much as you want on my stockings. Bite your way up my thighs. Enter me and let me wrap my legs around you. You have earned it. You have saved millions of porn users today.”

Charles followed her to the bed.