May 132006
 

I decided to give AudioBlogger another try. This time I wanted to tell a pretty short story and make it audio based. It was a story that I thought was pretty sexy. My voice went weird in a few places but I figured I would wait till it was up to decide on whether to keep it. I recorded it on Audioblogger and waited.

And waited.

Well after ten minutes I decided to try again. I re-recorded it and this time my voice was much better. Then I waited.

And when it still didn’t post, I went radical. I started a new blog under a new screen name just for the purposes of getting my audioblog posts. this time I also rewrote a little of it and it was much smoother.

That didn’t work either.

Well crap.

So next I tried using Windows Sound Recorder on my PC. I can always find a host site, right? It went pretty well till the damned recorder shut me off halfway. Apparently a minute is as long a sound file as it will make.

Sigh.

I could offer to read it to you each individually but the phone charges might get a little much. I’ll just have to wait till I get some sort of technical answer.

In the mean time, Wrygirl gave me a nice little recognition for the productive week I’ve been having. Wow. After years of struggling to get my confidence and writing back to where it was, you have no idea how much this means to me. I have felt really good about myself this week and this nice honor, even if its only for a week, really reaffirms how I am feeling. Thank you from the bottom of my perverse heart.

As for the Erotica Alert, I have this bad feeling that at 8 at night, my Blog is going to have multiple late Audioblog posts arrive. You’ve been warned. Have duct tape and lotion ready.

****Update- I was close. It was 9pm lol. I’ve got four copies floating around I think the one posted works best. ****

May 122006
 

Christine lived for Fridays. That was the night that her husband went off to his friend’s house and watched movies, played videogames and for all Christine knew, went cruising for hookers into the late hours of the night. It was the night that her husband was so busy being a male jerk with his guy friends that he didn’t give a rat’s ass what Christine did with her time.

He actually thought she hung out with her coworkers for drinks.

It was Friday morning but Christine was here, parking in her lover’s driveway instead of heading to work. She slammed the door to the car and rushed up the steps. Usually they don’t meet till after she got off work but this morning, he sent her a text message requesting her to stop by before heading to work. No explanation was offered, but that wasn’t unusual. Christine’s lover was not the explaining type.

He answered on the third knock. Christine groaned when she saw he was dressed only in his boxers. The cock she had grown to love was pushing against the loose fabric. It was hard and Christine thought she knew why he had called.

“I don’t have time,” Christine said. “I’ll be late for work.”

“Yes you will be late,” he said. “So start working on your excuse now.”

Click whole Post to Continue Reading


He took her hand and pulled her gently into his house. The closing of the door sealed off the outside world and Christine went to kiss him. He kissed her back but broke it off much too soon.

“Open your blouse,” he said. “Quickly.”

She obeyed. Her fingers moved fast under the urgency of his command. She bared herself to him, hoping that he appreciated the scarlet bra she had picked for their rendezvous tonight.

Instead, he reached for a purple marker he had set beside the door. He uncapped it and turned back towards her. While she held her blouse open, he reached inside her bra and pulled her breast out of the cup.

“What are you doing?” she asked.

“Making you a promise for tonight,” he said. Across the top of her nipple he very carefully wrote a four letter word. The pen was cold against her skin and Christine shivered. Then she shivered again as she read what he had written.

It was the word ‘BITE’.

He gave her nipple a very brief, almost reverent kiss and then he blew across the letters to make them dry faster. Then he put her breast back into her bra cup. Her lover reached into the other cup and pulled her breast free. Christine stood there, still holding her blouse open as he wrote another word across this nipple with the cold marker.

This time the word was ‘PINCH’.

He blew again across the letters and Christine moaned. She looked down to see her nipple was hard but somehow, she knew that he wouldn’t fulfill that promise right now. She would have to wait all day till tonight.

“Turn around and show me your back,” he said.

Christine turned around. He used much bigger letters this time as he wrote across her shoulders. As he wrote, she slowly figured out what he wrote by the chills he made on her back.

He wrote, ‘MOUNT ME’.

“Put your blouse on and take off your pants,” he said.

Christine did as he said. She worried about the ink staining her blouse but she still did as he asked. Clothes can be washed or replaced. Her lover’s pride in her was much harder to replace.

She dropped her pants to her ankles. Christine went ahead and slid her black panties down as well. Her body was tingling and she wanted to make sure her lover made promises everywhere.

He didn’t disappoint. Kneeling down so that he was eye level with her sex, he took his pen in hand and wrote right above her pubic hair line. Painstakingly he wrote his word and when she realized what it was, she couldn’t help clench at the thought.

The word was ‘FUCK’.

His hand gripped around a thigh and forced her legs apart. Above the knee and stretching in large letters towards her sex he wrote his word. The marker no longer chilled her but then again, perhaps it was the heat of the promises of tonight that kept her toasty.

He wrote ‘PART’.

Christine could feel how wet she was when he wrote the same word on her other thigh. Forget work. Forget her husband. Forget all the hundreds of reasons she should not be here. Christine just wanted to crawl into the bedroom and surrender to her lover all day today, tomorrow and for the rest of your life.

“Turn around,” he said.

Hobbled by her pants and panties around her ankles, Christine turned around the best she could. She felt his breath on her ass and her cheeks tightened. The bite she was expecting never came. Instead of sharp teeth, it was the wet tracing of the marker. Down each buttock, spaced perfectly along the curve of her bottom her wrote:

S

P

A

N

K

“Okay, pull your pants back up,” he said.

She groaned. No fingers on her sex. No slap of his hand on her bottom. No quick slip of his cock into her. He was really going to make her wait.

He stayed behind her as she redressed. It was a small relief because Christine wasn’t sure she couldn’t keep her face from scowling. He was making her late for work and making her terribly horny. She knew that tonight would all be worth it but for now, she was just frustrated and wet.

“Wait,” he said. His hand took a hold of her long hair and curled it around his fist. Christine swallowed hard. Maybe he would spank her after all.

Instead, she felt the marker touch her neck right below her hair. She knew that spot. It was where his jaws would come down on her when they made love. It was where he bit her like a tiger as he pushed himself inside her.

“Oh please, no,” she said. “People will see.”

“Not if you’re careful” he said.

She felt the words but she wasn’t ready for them. It took her by surprise, more so than anything else he did today. When he was done, he kisses her again on the lips and told her to go to work. In a daze she left his house. Marked nine times by him in ways no one would see. Ways no one should see.

When she got in her car, she took out her compact. It wasn’t east to hold her hair up and catch the reflection of the back of her neck in both the rear view mirror and the compact, but she did it. She only saw it for a moment before her eyes misted over. The purple letters were locked in her mind.

He had written, “LOVE ME”.

May 122006
 

Compliments are funny things.

Today I took someone’s Half Nekkid Thursday picture and put it up as my wallpaper on my computer. I did it because the image was exactly what I want to see and it got me thinking dirty thoughts. Dirty thoughts are nice because when I sit down to my computer, I want my wallpaper to spark dirty thoughts and get my writing going right there.

Now I would like to tell this person that I put up their picture up as wallpaper but that strikes me as semi-stalkerish. Sure they put that image out there for the world to see, but do they really want to know that I have that image super-sized across my screen and that when company comes over, they’ll be seeing her too? Do they want to know that my wife will be checking it out and will make some comment about my weakness for ______? Do they want to know their body will be contributing to my output for the week? Heck, if I write a really violent story that just happens to be percolating inside me, will they freak out and re-examine their picture wondering how in the world it inspired a story about junkyard orgies?

On a stranger note, it feels like I am picking favorites. I love half Nekkid Thursday because it makes me look at my body in a way I am not used to doing. I approach myself as a sexual object worthy of photographing. I see that same approach in my favorite image posters and I love each and every one of them. If I say, hey, so-and-so’s image today is now plastered across 19 inches of monitor I feel like I am somehow saying the other lovely images just weren’t sexy enough. They were, they just didn’t coincide with what I was thinking right now. Half nekkid Thursday is one of the most sex positive things I have seen. I don’t ever want to fuck it up for someone.

So here’s to you, unknowing contributor to my erotic state of mind. Today you struck gold with me and I wasn’t willing to let you go just yet. I’ll be looking at your image for a nice long time and who knows what stories may come. You did great today and I really appreciate it.

May 092006
 

My wife and I are pretty nice people. We think a lot about other people’s perspectives and we work extra hard to make sure that we don’t offend or hurt people. We are just that sweet.

Now the hard part for us is that we spend a lot of time together and we are soaking in a sweet environment and then we go outside and the bus driver snarls at us. Or a coworker just says something petty and mean about us. Unexplained hostility baffles us, and for the longest time we didn’t know how to cope. We would break our backs to be nice to these assholes and try to win them over. Or worse, we would be really hurt that the asshole hurt us, and we wondered what we had done to anger them.

One day I had an epiphany. I was reading a book and there was this asshole character. As a writer, I recognized that the asshole existed to give the main character grief. The asshole didn’t have a life, or a background or even a spouse as far as the reader was concerned. The asshole was there to be a pain in the ass and for the main character to show us something of the character’s nature by interacting with him. I got to thinking about the asshole in the book and realized I would never see any more depth than what his role was.

My epiphany was that I realized that there are a lot of people in real life that are just assholes. They have been picked out of a Cosmic Cast for the role. Now, my compassionate understanding side knows that every asshole in the world has a reason. Maybe the coworker was abused as a child. Maybe the asshole waiter is in a loveless marriage. Maybe, just maybe, the asshole enjoys being an asshole. The thing is, we don’t know. Only very rarely will we get to see the spin-off story that details why the asshole is an asshole. They might have a cool origin story that justifies them but for now, in the Book that is your life, you will never read that part. You are stuck with them as they are: An asshole. They literally have the same worth of attention as evil foot soldier in a fantasy novel. Do you really want to sit down and find out why the Orc hates Elves so much? He just does.

I took this attitude and started applying it. It doesn’t matter if you think life is governed by Karma, or by God or by Space Aliens living in lava, you can only live the life that was written for you or that you write yourself. In this big giant Novel, there are too many characters to cast and the Cosmic Writer only has so much space to detail these characters. You have to learn to prioritize.

If I told you that your life was only 1000 pages long, do you really want fifty of those pages to be about how your asshole coworker makes you feel bad? Of course not. You only have 1000 pages, save those pages for the sexy coworker you really want to know about. Or for your family. Or for yourself. Every moment you waste on the asshole in your life is pages taking away from your Novel. I know some novels are about how the grumpy old guy became a wonderful kind person but you know, that’s the Asshole’s novel not yours. You got shit to do and adventures to have.

Now if you are married this asshole, well, that’s a whole other problem. I do suggest this though. How much time that person sucks out of your novel is within your power. You can cut them out completely, or you can relegate them to bit character role. And if they get upset that you have marginalized them to bit character role and start pushing back to become more of a starring Asshole role, well, I think you know it’s time drop them out of the book altogether.

What surprised me about thinking like this is I have lost a lot of my anger when dealing with assholes. Some guy insults me on a blog comment or a forum, they get busted down to Bit Character Asshole. Someone I work with is being unreasonable, I try to make the situation better but I don’t lose any sleep on why they are a pain in my ass. They just are. I think about them as much as I think about the Token Jerk on an office sitcom.

As human beings, it’s okay to want to know why assholes are assholes. It’s compassionate to want to improve their mood. I’m just asking that before you waste time, energy and pages out of your life, that you take a moment and consider that they just might be Assholes assigned to the role of pissing on your day. Then I want you to consider if you really want that kind of a Novel. If you’re anything like me, you’d rather be spending that energy looking for the Femme Foil in your Novel.

May 082006
 

I hate Scrabble. Even though I am a writer, I am an awful speller and it is hard for me to look at letters and make words. I like being creative and Scrabble feels like a giant confinement game where you do not make up words, you find them.

Having said that, Dirty Word Scrabble is my favorite way to play. Everyone who has tried it loves it, and it was a huge hit at a BDSM weekend we went to. They sneered at the idea but after ten minutes we had to turn players away.

The rules are simple. Use the normal Scrabble rules except the only words allowed are Dirty. Pussy, cock, master, spank, orgasm are all good, but grocery will get you laughed at.

The definition of a Dirty Word is any word that makes the other players groan, giggle or blush. If you doubt whether your word is dirty, just lay it out and wait for their reaction. if the players scratch their heads and can’t figure out how ‘wait’ is a dirty word, then you are to remove your word and try again. Unlike normal Scrabble, there is no penalty for putting down an invalid word. Dirty Word Scrabble is much friendlier and more of a mutual judging event.

The Puss Rule- the Puss rule states that there is a difference between a Dirty Word and a word that is gross and is turning off the players. The Puss rule tolerance levels will vary from group to group. Warts, discharge, puss and herpes are good examples of words that can kill the mood at a game. ‘Kids’ by the way was the word that inspired the Puss Rule.

Racial slurs are not Dirty Words either unless your group is going to hell.

Abbreviations are allowed if they are sex oriented. ‘ASL’ is good, as well as ‘BDSM’.

Now, if you lay out a word that can form a second word because the letters are up against other letters, the second word can be NOT dirty. If you spell out ‘Blowjob’ and the ‘o’ is up against an ‘f’, then the word ‘of’ is allowed to be included in your points total.

Proper names are not Dirty Words unless it is the proper name of one of the players at the game.

What I love about dirty Word Scrabble is that the board takes on a vibe. Looking at ‘boobs’, ‘blowjobs’ ‘clamps’ and ‘mammary’ at the board at the same time gets you thinking in a certain direction and all of a sudden you’re busting out thirty different words for breasts. When I play it with my BDSM friends, the board looks like a leather catalog. When I play with my gay friends, the board takes on a male oriented board that just sucks the estrogen out of the room. When you get four people with completely different kinks and interests, you find yourself learning far more than you ever wanted to know.

I recommend for your first game you get two Scrabble games and combine the letters. A lot of dirty words share some pretty rare letters and people will find it easier with more letters. After a few tries, you can drop down to one set of letters just fine.

Dirty Word Scrabble is the most fun non-fucking each other adults can have together.

May 052006
 

Relish every kiss.

Savor every touch.

Treasure every lover.

Soak in every erotic story.

Enjoy every beautiful body.

Shudder every time you masturbate.

Take off your clothes like a stripper.

Appreciate every comment on your blog.

It doesn’t matter if you have a lover or not. It doesn’t matter if you are getting laid three times a day or not. It doesn’t matter if you are beautiful, ugly, fat, skinny, disabled, young or old. How successful you are in gaining your desires doesn’t define you. You love sex and you are a one person non-stop orgy of sexual thought, energy and sensuality.

Never stop climaxing in your mind.

May 022006
 

1) I work from home at a real stop and go job. Some days I spend hours working where I have one minute of free time followed by three minutes of work followed by one minute of free time. I can’t really write in those conditions but I can’t just sit there either. Because I am always multi-tasking, I am constantly hitting web pages and some mindless boring work days, I will hit the same blog twelve times a day. In an hour.

So if you see me commenting on a blog you read six times within an afternoon, I’m not really stalking anyone. If you are looking at your web stats and wondering why a guy in Atlanta visits your site five times in an hour, I’m not stalking you either. I’m just clicking through my favorites like a zombie praying for work to get over and distracting myself with sexy blogs.

2) My first girlfriend in high school wouldn’t let me touch her below the waist but she would call me up late at night and ask me to tell her an erotic story that she could masturbate to. Yeah, no wonder I have the hobbies that I do.

3) I like vanilla as a flavor. I know, I’m kinky so I should like chocolate or something far more exotic. I am a shame to the BDSM community.

4) I don’t like to write sad stories because that means for way too long I am going to be thinking depressing thoughts and trying to understand how badly characters are feeling.

5) I take a shower every morning not because I really need to as much as I just love the feel of hot water all over my body.

6) The most painful ass-switching toy I have ever used was the plastic rod that are on every plastic window blinds. When I go to other people’s houses, I like to think that blinds are a sure sign of kinkiness.

May 022006
 

Sugasm #32

Tue 2nd May, 06

This week’s best of the sex blogs by the bloggers who blog them. Want in the next one? Submit a link to your best post of the week using this form. Participants, repost the linklist by the end of Wednesday night and you’re all set.

Audio

Audioblog Posts 1 and 2 (alwaysarousedgirl.blogspot.com)

First Ever Audio Post (secretsofadirtygirl.blogspot.com)

Funny / Sex News

Alas Poor Yorick, I Blew Him Well (tgp.com)

The Hooters Conspiracy (ethnorotica.com)

League of Super Friends with Benefits (shayssexcolumn.blogspot.com)

My Most Embarrassing Sex Moment (radicalvixen.com)

Thoughts on Sex, Sexy Reviews, Sex Advice

5 Senses (gentlygently.blogspot.com)

Anonymity (gentlebutfirm.blogspot.com)

Cultural Differences (sugarbank.com)

Masturbation and Ejaculatory Inevitability (onaniajournal.blogspot.com)

More Pixilated Nudity (4thegirlnextdoor.blogspot.com)

Natural Contours – Ultime (sin.typepad.com/shauna_by_night)

Sex Tip – From a Men’s Magazine (seskuality.com)

Sexual Balance (eroticvision.blogspot.com)

You Asked: What Do I Consider Cheating? (cuntinglinguist.blogspot.com)

BDSM and Fetish

Bondage Fantasies (darkside-journey.blogspot.com)

Contemplation of the Lower Navel (sabrinainstockings.com)

DVD: “And For You I Will Come As Well” (Lupus Pictures) (adelehaze.com)

Sexual Healing (aliferestarted.blogspot.com)

Erotic Writing

Climax (erotiterrorist.blogspot.com)

More Sugasm…

Join the Sugasm

(Sugasm participants should re-post all the links above. The following links may be excluded as long as you include all the above links.)

The Dirty Couple in Florida (or what we did on our Spring Break) Part 2 (drtycplinva.blogspot.com)

Fun with the Kama Sutra (thetastetester.com)

Morning Licks (vivianandjack.blogspot.com)

Of Blindfolds and Bedmates (easilyaroused.co.uk)

People Watching (seanandmel.blogspot.com)

Public Masturbation (wanklog.blogspot.com)

Questions About Etiquette (realadultsex.com)

Sweet Slut (can also go in BDSM) (nyc-urban-gypsy.blogspot.com)

Wine and a Wandering Mind (the-sensuous-libertine.blogspot.com)

NSFW Pics / Photos

Alicia Witt Revisited (pornhater.com)

Double HNT (spiritsex.blogspot.com)

Four Galleries of Liza from Galitsin News (sensualarousalblog.com)

Happy Half-Nekkid Thursday! (stilettodiaries.blogspot.com)

Kyla Cole 3 (babelog.sestaluna.com)

Miranda and Steph make love shot by Abby Winters (iloveabbywinters.com)

Naughty Office (internetisforporn.com)

Original Upskirt Photos Just Released (put under news/announcements?) (taratainton.com)

Paulina and Zafrina on Sapphic Erotica (simply-sapphicerotica.com)

Threesome Pic (seska4lovers.com)

Xanthia Nude (eroticandy.blogspot.com)

Smokin’ Lara cartoon originally posted on the sexy fun blog The Girl Next Door.

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