Jul 172020

Television shows are winding down or going on hiatus because current COVID-19 lockdowns prevent companies from making new episodes. I spend a lot of time wondering what if those shows will acknowledge these weird pandemic times when they get back.

My first assumption is that a lot of the shows will pick up after the pandemic. There will be jokes about characters did while working from home. Or there might be plots where characters investigate why so-and-so never came back. I think the pandemic will be treated as something that happened off screen.

I get that. After months, and possibly a year or more of being on lockdown, people might want their fiction to get back to normal as soon as possible.

But I hope not. I feel like some shows, especially superhero or genre shows, might be a heck of a lot more interesting if they spent a season dealing with a pandemic. Does crime drop in Gotham with everyone home? Do serial killers run out of easy prey? Do monsters get COVID? I want to find out.

I also wonder what the first movie that is informed by the COVID experience looks like. We now know for sure that a large number of Americans refuse to take even the most basic safety precaution if Fox News tells them not to. Modern zombie movies should have conservatives sticking their arms into zombies’ mouths to prove that transmission-by-biting is a liberal hoax.

Porn, of course, is already leading the way. A quick check of clip sites bring up results for self-isolation, pandemic and quarantine. Self-isolation is a classic “Oh no, we’re stuck together and you are looking hot but you’re my not-quite-familial relation!” The thrill of the illicit affair can be be replaced with the fear of breaking quarantine. Is that pussy really worth getting sick and maybe killing grandma? Maybe, if grandma is really racist!

Let’s just hope that enough of us survive to get to see the post-pandemic fiction.

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