May 022018
 

Explorer’s Log: I am on day thirty-three of my forty-five day journey to the star system designated “The Way the Queen Makes Me Feel” by Royal Astronomers. It is a lonely stretch of space, free of spatial anomalies, meteors, and stray cosmic rays. At least, that was what I thought.

Sensors have picked up a vessel drifting in space. Vessel might be too generous of a word as it has no thrusters or visible means of propulsion. I suspect it might be a satellite that has broken free of its orbit. Long range scans have picked up writing on the side of the vessel. It is a version of Mistral and reads as “The Orbiter of Fuck”.

The vessel has no distress signal but scans reveal that there is power. I attempted contact and a robotic voice responded. It identified as Wanderer and informed me that one biological unit was on board as well as four robots. Wanderer invited me on board, and the invitation was open to any robots that may accompany me.

Chairbot overheard the invitation and pestered me to join. I have graciously allowed his request in case the situation turns violent. I am not sure what Chairbot can do offensively but maybe he can take a laser shot while I escape.

Docking will be in twenty minutes. End Explorer’s Log.

Explorer’s Personal Log: Making contact with a drifting vessel is never a good idea because of the possibility of the inhabitants wanting to hijack my ship, but I find that people adrift in space are usually horny as fuck and that is something I like to take advantage of.

The airlock to The Orbiter of Fuck opened and air hissed into the docking tunnel. Vaquel Di stood with her feet apart and her hands on her hips. She stood in the perfect spot for the light to show off her rich brown skin and short pink hair. The yellow spacesuit she wore covered her body from neck to toe and was tight enough to showcase her large breasts, round hips, thick thighs and curvy butt. She had taken extra care earlier to pull her spacesuit tight against her sex to the line of her pussy lips were clearly visible.

“There’s no one here, Mistress,” Chairbot said. The purple robot rolled ahead of her and out of the airlock. The chair swiveled both directions down the hallway.

Vaquel sighed and relaxed out of her pose. “Have we been stood up?” She stepped out into the hallway and looked around. No one was there.

“Hello,” a soft female voice said. It came from above. Vaquel looked up to see a pale head descending towards them. The head had four eyes, dirty purple hair, and a gaping mouth with bright red lipstick on the lips. The head was connected to a cable that extended to the ceiling.

“Sorry I am late,” the head said,” but I had to check on the engines. I am the only one who does any work around here. My name is Wanderer, we spoke earlier.”
“Yes, hello,” Vaquel said. “My name is Vaquel and this is Chairbot.” Vaquel was at a loss for words. The talking head was expression-less. Looking closer, she saw that the eyes were painted on as well as the lips. The mouth was some sort of open port.

Chairbot didn’t have any such problems. “Hello! I see your cable is attached to a track. Does that allow you to roam the ship?”

“Yes,” Wanderer replied. “I was designed to maintain ship systems, which I still do but my primary task these days is to provide oral sex. Would you care for some oral sex, Vaquel?”

Vaquel looked at the gaping mouth and shook her head. “I’m good.”

“Then please proceed to your right,” Wanderer said. “The crew almost never leave the Presentation Room. I have activated the guiding lights to lead you to your destination. They will be very happy to see you.”

“Thank you, Wanderer,” Vaquel said. “Come on Chairbot, let’s find us some lonely space travelers.”

“But what if I want oral sex, Mistress?” Chairbot asked.

Vaquel sighed. “You have no idea where that mouth has been. Besides, what would she suck, your wheel? Come on!”

The lights guided Vaquel and Chairbot through the ship. The hallways were dirty and some of the lights flashed or didn’t work. Empty cans meant to hold beverages rolled across the floor while piles of wiring were lumped in corners.

“These guys have been here a while,” Vaquel said. “Be on guard, they might be a bit unstable.”

“Yes, Mistress!” Chairbot said.

They finally reached the Presentation Room. A door slid open and jammed partway through. Vaquel had to pull on the door to get it open wide enough for her and Chairbot to walk through.

“Welcome to the Orbitor of Fuck!” a cheerful voice said. Standing behind a counter was a pale humanoid with frizzy red hair. His skin was pasty and looked unhealthy and there was a hint of madness in his bright four eyes. The green jumpsuit he wore was tattered and hung loosely on his gaunt frame.

“My name is Kole!” the humanoid said.

“My name is Vaquel,” she said as she approached the counter. “This is my servant, Chairbot.”

“No, no!” Kole snapped. “You’re blocking Oculus! You need to walk around to this side of the counter so he can see us!”

Vaquel glanced at Oculus. It was a floating robot with a giant sensor array. The robot turned to focus on Vaquel.

“Uh, okay,” Vaquel said as she came around to the same side of the counter as Kole.

“Do I have to come around the counter too?” Chairbot asked.

“No little buddy,” Kole said. “I’ll pick you up.”

Kole walked around the counter and Vaquel nearly gasped. The pasty humanoid looked like a collection of sticks in his jumpsuit but the bulge between his legs was like a large snake. The bulge throbbed as he walked and Vaquel felt a little light headed.

Bending over, Kole picked Chairbot up with ease and placed him on the counter. He then walked around Vaquel to resume his earlier position. His bulge brushed against Vaquel’s leg and she had a good guess at to its immense thickness.

Vaquel wanted to ask Kole about his anatomy but she was curious about Oculus. “Is Oculus recording our conversation?”

“Of course,” Kole said. “The scientists who built this orbiter used to contact the test subjects and see how they were doing. They also demanded that the subjects make sex toys and this is where they presented them.”

“You said that they used to, do they not do it anymore?” Vaquel asked.

“No, they stopped that ages ago,” Kole said. “But you never know, they might call back one day and I want to be ready!”

Vaquel nodded. This poor creature was a lunatic. “Wanderer said that the crew was here? Did she mean you and Oculus?”

Kole raised his hands to his mouth and shouted, “Artificial Intelligence roll call!”

Speakers crackled to life all around the Presentation Room. “Oculus!”

Oculus swiveled from left to right before centering himself again.

“Wanderer!”

The painted head of Wanderer dropped down from the ceiling and then zipped back up.

“Vendo!”

A gray and pink orb flew from across the room to land on the counter. The orb was transparent and contained several small spheres inside it. Small arms were attached to the sides of the globe and a crude speaker had been bolted on. The arms waved at Vaquel.

“Swaaaaaawk!”

A humanoid robot painted silver fell from the ceiling. It was short and barely came up to Vaquel’s waist. It looked like a poor imitation of the same species Kole was, except his nose was a long phallic object.

“Queen’s tit!” Vaquel swore. She was surrounded by robots. “Is that all of you?”

“We forgot Chairbot!” Kole said.

“He doesn’t get a rollcall,” the silver robot said. “He’s just a guest star.”

“That doesn’t seem fair, Squawk,” the orb said. “He should at least get a guest credit.”

“Guest credits are only for robots who give their lives for replacement parts, Vendo!” Squawk snapped.

“Guys, guys, save it for the next committee meeting! We have guests,” Kole said.

Vaquel stared at Kole and the robots. Could robots be insane too? Maybe it was a side effect of being around an insane biological creature.

Before Vaquel could say anything, red lights began to flash in the Presentation Room. Kole’s eyes went wide and Squawk and Vendo waved their arms. All of them began to scream.

“Pornography Time!” they yelled.

“What?” Vaquel asked.

“We got to go before the air is sucked out and the lasers are activated!” Kole screamed. He grabbed Vaquel by the hand pulled her towards a door. The door opened to reveal a hallway with another door at the far end. As they ran, the far door opened to reveal another door and a door further down.

“Lasers?” Vaquel yelled. “What is going on?”

“It is the experiment!” Kole yelled. They passed through a door with another door down the hallway. “The scientists wanted to study the effects of pornography on the brain. They kidnapped one of their employees, put him on the Orbiter and made him watch a million pornographic films! They sent the worse they could find!”

They passed through a door and the hallway continued. The klaxons were louder. Small turrets in the ceiling tracked them. There was the sound of hissing air.

Vaquel looked behind her. Chairbot was following her. Squawk was sitting on Chairbot and making excited happy sounds. Vendo flew beside them, waving his arms. Behind all of them, Oculus followed along, recording everything.

“What happened to the guy they sent here?” Vaquel yelled.

“Oh, he found the escape pod and left,” Kole said. “The second guy choked himself to death masturbating and the third guy died from dehydration. After they sent me, there was some sort of accident and the Orbiter was sent flying through space. The movies are still playing though!”

The hallway finally ended at a dark room. A giant video screen took up an entire wall. A row of seats was set in the middle of the room. The floor was sticky and discarded tissues were everywhere.

Kole went to a well-worn seat and sat down. He patted the seat next to him and Vaquel sat down as well. Chairbot rolled into the room and Squawk jumped off. The silver robot took a seat beside Vaquel while Vendo floated to Kole’s right. Chairbot zoomed in front of Vaquel while Oculus took up a position behind them.

The screen flickered to life. Horns played a slow rhythm. A pasty creature the same species as Kole appeared on the screen. The creature appeared to be male and wore a jumpsuit loaded down with technical equipment.

“Oh great,” Squawk said. “Another repair technician. Why can’t we watch a movie about other professions fucking?”

“Can’t you change the movie?” Vaquel said.

“No,” Kole said sadly. “We can’t stop them, we can’t start them, and we can never pick them. Wanderer has tried but the pornography is hardwired into the station.”

On screen, the repair technician walked into a shabbily furnished room. There was another pale person of the species, wearing a tight jumpsuit. Four bulges on her chest appeared to be breasts. Frizzy red hair hung down her face and framed her four eyes.

“Are you the environmental repair technician?” the female alien asked.

“Yes, I am,” the male responded.

“Good, the system is too cold. I’m freezing!” the female said.

The music shifted. Drums began to beat. A whimsical wind instrument grew louder.

“Well, I know a way to keep warm,” the male said and the two pressed their mouths together.

“Aw, yeah,” Vendo said. He floated past Kole and approached Vaquel. The orb body began to buzz. It settled down on Vaquel’s lap and she felt strong vibrations coming from the robot.

“Whoa!” Vaquel said. “What are you doing?” She made no attempt to stop the robot.

“Relax,” Vendo said. “I am just keeping your genitals warm. It gets drafty in the theater.”

The buzzing increased and Vaquel groaned. The tiny spheres inside the orb body of Vendo bounced around furiously. The little hands grabbed her thighs as the orb rubbed back and forth.

“Her esophagus must be really cold,” Kole said, staring at the screen. He unzipped his jumpsuit and pulled out his pasty cock from a seam. It was just as large and thick as Vaquel suspected. He used both hands to stroke it as he watched the action on the screen.

“You guys do this a lot?” Vaquel said as Vendo buzzed harder between her legs.

“Three times a day,” Squawk said. The silver robot leaned closer to Vaquel. The tip of his phallic nose brushed her cheeks. “Want me to warm up your throat?”

Before Vaquel could respond, Squawk pushed his nose between her lips. Vaquel opened her mouth and was surprised to find he tasted sweet. The phallic nose filled her mouth and her lips instinctively closed around it.

“I mean, what else are we going to do?” Kole said as he stroked himself. “It’s free porn. We might as well enjoy it.”

Vaquel wanted to bring up the possibility of getting burned out on pornography but it was hard to ask questions with a dildo in her mouth. She also stopped caring about the question as Vendo’s vibrations reached a new peak. She decided to stop thinking and just relax into it.

“Hey, Kole, would you like to sit on me?” Chairbot said. “I am really comfortable, and I’ve got vibrators!”

“That would be great, little buddy!” Kole said and he moved to sit on Chairbot. The vibrators roared to life and Kole groaned.

Vaquel was shocked. She had no idea that Chairbot enjoyed other butts. She thought that the robot only liked her. There was a twinge of jealousy, but it quickly faded.

On the screen, another male in a white jumpsuit appeared. “Did someone order a physical therapist?”

The female alien broke her kiss with the previous male. “Oh, no! I forgot that I called two specialists today!”

“That’s okay, we’re professionals,” the said the second male. “We can both do our jobs and get you back up and running.”

The second male got down on his knees and began to munch on the woman’s ass through her tight jumpsuit. The first male opened her suit to reveal her four pasty breasts. He started to munch on her nipples. The female groaned between their dual mouths.

Much like Vaquel was groaning now. Squawk carefully slid his dildo nose in and out of her mouth. As he did that, his hand went to one of Vaquel’s breasts. The robot’s hand squeezed her tit and her thin spacesuit offered no protection.

Meanwhile, Vendo was grinding harder between her legs. The vibrations grew stronger and the small speaker on top of the orb began to shake. The tiny metal hands clenched harder on her spacesuit.

Vaquel reached down and pressed a button on her belt. The yellow spacesuit on her chest retracted into the belt. Her dark brown breasts were exposed in the dim light of the video screen.

“Wow, you are really dark,” Squawk said. The silver robot squeezed both of her breasts with his metal hands. “These are the second largest pair of breasts I have ever seen! Check them out, Kole!”

Kole didn’t say anything. He was staring up at the video screen, pumping his cock as Chairbot happily vibrated underneath him. Chairbot had engaged his reclining feature and Kole had tilted way back.

Up on the screen, a second female technician had joined the scene. Vaquel didn’t understand what her job was but it involved sucking on the first female’s fingers. Almost everyone was naked now and sprawled across an uncomfortable desk.

Vaquel pressed a second button on her belt. The yellow spacesuit covering her pelvis and legs retracted into her belt; exposing her bright pink pubic bush. Vendo hovered above her sex for only a second before dropping down onto her. The powerful vibrations pressed against her pussy lips.

“Mmmmm!” Vaquel moaned with Squawk’s phallic nose in her mouth. She gripped the edges of her chair. Her hips bucked against Vendo, grinding her sex against the vibrating robot.

Squawk’s hands moved to Vaquel’s nipples. The metal fingers rolled over her hard nubs and lightly flicked them. For a robot, he was surprisingly gentle.

Vaquel wasn’t in the mood for gentle. She pushed Squawk until his nose was out of her mouth. “Hey, Kole! Don’t you want to fuck a real pussy instead of just looking at one on screen?”

Kole looked back at her and then back at the screen. “I would but I don’t want to miss the movie.”

“Queen’s tit,” Vaquel said. She pushed Vendo’s vibrating body away from her sex and stood up. An immense damp spot sat like a lake on the seat. She walked over to Kole and grabbed his arm. He reluctantly stood up as Vaquel took his place on Chairbot. Spinning the seat around, she turned and faced the standing alien with her back to the screen.

“There, now you can fuck and watch,” Vaquel said.

Vaquel leaned back on Chairbot and spread her legs into the air. Kole grabbed her ankles and held her legs wide as he pushed into her. Vaquel’s ass was lifted from the seat as his thick cock invaded her. Decimeter by decimeter, his pasty cock disappeared into her dark lips.

Kole shuddered and then began to fuck her. He quickly accelerated and within seconds, his cock was pummeling her tight sex. For a skinny alien, he had a lot of thrusting power and wasn’t afraid to use it.

A loud grunt from the theater speakers caught Kole’s attention. He looked up and laughed. “That does not look like a regulation depth checker!”

Squawk and Vendo laughed. Vaquel’s weight was on her shoulders as Chairbot struggled to support her. She twisted her head to look at the screen. One of the male technicians had his cock embedded in the first female alien’s ass.

“Neither is this one,” Squawk said and something hard pressed between Vaquel’s exposed buttocks. It was his nose! The nose squirted something warm and slippery against her asshole right as his nose pushed inside of her.

“Queen’s mercy!” Vaquel cried out. Squawk’s nose was a tight fit in her ass and so was Kole’s cock in her pussy. The two of them were giant rods inside her shuddering body.

“Let me get a better seat here,” Vendo said and the floating robot flew onto Vaquel’s sex. The vibrating orb pressed down on her sex with Kole’s cock inside her.

“Fuck!” Vaquel cried. She gripped the edges of Chairbot’s seat. The seat purred to life, vibrating against her back. clenching muscles relaxed as the twin cocks continued to fuck her.

Something purple dropped from the ceiling. It was Wanderer. The head of the robot landed on one of Vaquel’s jiggling breast with the mouth around her nipple. Powerful suction sealed the mouth tightly against Vaquel’s skin.

Vaquel shuddered in bliss. So many sensations competed for her attention. Vendo’s body buzzed against her sex lips as Kole fucked her. Squawk’s nose slowly slid in and out of her asshole while Wanderer sucked her nipple. Chairbot’s seat vibrated against her back as the sounds of the pornographic movie filled the arena with grunts and sighs.

A shape flew above her. It was Obscurus. It looked down on Vaquel, recording the orgy of robots and flesh.

Kole still watched the screen. “Wait, isn’t that technician with the short hair the soldier from that movie with the pirate sluts?” As he spoke, his hips kept fucking Vaquel.

“I don’t know! All I see is ass!” Squawk said with his nose buried in Vaquel’s asshole.

Vendo spun around on Vaquel’s sex. The vibrations rotated against Vaquel’s pussy lips and she gasped.

“Yep, he’s the soldier from the pirate slut movie,” Vendo said. “And he was the student from the sex academy movie last week!”

“Wow, that guy has range!” Kole observed as he fucked Vaquel.

“Him and his cock!” Vendo said.

Kole and the three robots laughed.

Vaquel ignored them. Let them watch the movie; she was focused on what was happening to her. Chairbot’s vibrations did wonders to her back. Wanderer’s suction on her breast made her nipple so sensitive. Squawk’s nose felt like it was going to split her ass apart while Kole’s cock drilled deep inside of her. Vendo’s buzzing brought her closer and closer to orgasm as Oculus watched and transmitted to Queen knows where.

“Yes, yes, yes, YES!” Vaquel cried. “Glory to the Queen!” she yelled as she reached her blissful climax.”

“Payload time!” Kole yelled and he pulled his cock out of Vaquel’s slick sex. He grabbed his long member and it began to twitch like it was trying to escape his hands. Vendo cried out and flew away while Wanderer released Vaquel’s nipple and ascended to the ceiling. Even Squawk withdrew, suddenly leaving Vaquel’s ass empty and hollow.

“What the fu-?” Was all Vaquel could get out before a blast of alien seed ejected from Kole’s cock. It was green and sprayed like a water hose. The first splash splattered against her face but the rest of it coated her breasts.

“Whoa!” Kole yelled. “All right, good job, everyone!” When his cock was done discharging, he slapped the hands of Squawk and Vendo in some sort of celebratory ritual.

“Fuck, do you always come that much?” Vaquel asked as she wiped her face.

“Yeah, sorry,” Kole said with a tone that gave away how unapologetic he was. “I think there is something in the food up here. I never really asked about it to be honest. “Wait here, I’ll go get you a towel.”

Kole left the theater as Vaquel sat up in Chairbot. Squawk and Vendo went back to watching the movie. A power technician had arrived and joined in the orgy. The two robots kept making jokes about what they were watching.

“Wait,” Vaquel said. “I thought the rest of the ship was unsafe during the movie? How can Kole get me a towel?”

“Oh, he probably turned on safety mode,” Vendo said. “We turn it on when we want to stage a quick reenactment or a skit. He just can’t stay out there too long. Safety mode usually turns off in a few minutes.”

Vaquel jumped to her feet. Green seed dripped from her face and tits. “Just long enough to steal my ship and get out of here! Come on, Chairbot!”

The doors opened for Vaquel and she ran down the hallway. Still covered in seed, she decided to run naked rather than have her suit slide back over her sticky body. She grabbed her laser pistol and thumbed it to the highest setting.

Chairbot speed past her down the hallway. “Mistress, I am detecting that he has entered the probe ship!”

“Fuck!” Vaquel screamed. She ran faster. Seed flew from her bouncing brown breasts. She entered the presentation Room and then down the hallway to her ship. Laser turrets in the walls tracked her but they didn’t fire.

The door to her ship was open. Chairbot was in the hallway facing the door. As Vaquel came closer, she saw Kole stepping out of her ship. His arms were full of something.

“Freeze!” Vaquel yelled. She stood and aimed her laser pistol. “Throwing out my shit before you steal my ship?”

“What? No!” Kole said. “I was umm, stealing your stuff, not your ship?”

Vaquel came closer. Kole was holding her underwear. He had bras and underwear of every color. It looked like he raided the dirty clothes hamper.

“You’re stealing my underwear?” Vaquel said. “I mean, I get it, I’m sexy but I thought you were stealing my ship.”

“Why would I steal your ship?” Kole asked.

“So you can get away from this crazy experiment!” Vaquel said.

“Why would I do that? I get food, a place to stay, robot friends and free porn! This place is great!”

Vaquel sighed. It hadn’t occurred to her that Kole enjoyed his predicament. Maybe she would too if she was trapped and had a hundred orgasms here. They called it Stuck-Come Syndrome back on her planet.

“Okay, just a misunderstanding,” Vaquel said as she holstered her pistol. “But still, you can’t take all of my underwear. They are not easy to replace. You can have some but not all, and you will have to pay me.”

“Pay you with what?” Kole said.

Vaquel looked down at Kole’s cock. “Let’s get back to the movie and I’ll tell you.

By the time the movie was over, Kole’s cock had earned three dirty panties and one very sweaty bra.

  3 Responses to “Fiction: Orbiter of Fuck”

  1. “Of course,” Kole said. “The scientists who built this orbiter used to contact the test subjects and see how they were doing. They also demanded that the subjects make sex toys and this is where they presented them.”

    This is about the line where I realized that this is just a porn and I should really just relax. I am so excited to read the rest of this now!!!

    • I almost added a line about learning to relax and just masturbate, but I thought I was already hitting about every trope of the show as it was lol

  2. porn version of Mystery Science Theater 3000

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