Apr 272015
 

It is silly to think that the internet is haunted. Some magicians believe that ghosts lurk in the internet, kept alive by Facebook pages that never expire. It is completely ridiculous.

The internet is a system of data, nothing more and nothing less. It is a collection of fixed points with its own system of laws and reality. Souls of the departed can’t haunt a house made of zeroes and ones.

Obviously the internet is not haunted by the ghosts of human beings. The internet is a realm full of its own magical beings. Duh.

Like most magical beings, the Internet Entities have their own agendas. The Voyeur Eyes of Blogspot want your soul laid bare. The pathetic ghouls of the Chan boards want destruction and misery. The forgotten nymphs of Usenet thrive on nude selfies. They take these offerings and convert it into power for their strange wars against each other.

New entities are born every day and older ones perish. Many take the guise of living people but do not be fooled. The greedy Prince will steal your money but there is no hidden treasure. A thousand spirits claim to be horny housewives waiting for your call but really they just want your semen sacrifice. The wise magician trusts no one on the internet.

The unwise magician however has a lot to gain. Internet Entities are greedy and yet bursting with the power of daily sacrifices given by unwitting users. These gods of the moment might not exist tomorrow but that doesn’t stop them from trying to spread their power as far and wide as possible. Unimaginable fame could be yours for the day. Money beyond counting can be had though the currency might only exist in a game about spaceships. Some magicians of the internet gain and lose more than in a single day than some magicians ever achieve with a lifetime of study.

Just beware the viruses. There is nothing worse than having your previous existence rewritten and deleted.

Samuel Noone
“The Pussy of Life”

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