Jan 172011
 

From the Farmer’s Daughter’s Almanac

The thrill of Christmas is gone and the alcohol of New Year’s Eve has been sweated out. Now is a prime time to energize a loved one or a perfect stranger with a properly timed handjob. The ideal times are listed below.

Jan 17 – Before they get out of bed.

Jan 18 – Shortly before lunch.

Jan 19 – 4:45 pm.

Jan 20 – After they watch you take a long and gratitous shower.

Jan 21 – Halfway through dinner.

Jan 22 – Once they are soundly asleep.

Jan 23 – During the preacher’s sermon about sin.

Farmer’s Daughter’s Tip- A handjob doesn’t need to be dry! Throw some spit on that hand to keep it slick!

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