If you want to hear me babble about myself then tune into Cult of Gracie Radio tonight. I have been preparing all week by studying myself and learning all sorts of interesting facts. Did you know I once wrote a story about a gangbang that took place inside a chocolate factory? That is some crazy shit.
In more important news, Hasbro is declaring the Agatha Christie period of murder mystery dead by updating Clue. No longer will there be Professors and Colonels, they have been replaced with athletes and tabloid stars. The murder takes place at a modern mansion that has a spa and a theater. There are now nine weapons and the lead pipe is gone. More disturbing to me is the introduction of a second deck of cards that can kill off players later in the game.
I am a huge fan of murder mysteries. I love everything about Clue except perhaps the mechanics of the game. The charters, the weapons and the mansion all evoke Agatha Christie perfectly but the way the game plays is simple elimination and deduction. It can be so straight forward that when I play it, I roleplay the character’s accusations, throwing in insults and delirium.
“I propose that the slutty wench, Ms. Scarlett, who’s advances were rejected by Mr. Body, grew so enraged that she used the revolver that she keeps in her purse and shot poor Mr. Body four times in the head while he tried to sink the 8-ball in the Billiards room. What say you to this accusation, Ms. Scarlett, if that is your real name? What do you say?”
The idea of a suspense deck is exciting. I like it. I am less amused by updating the characters to tabloid level stars. There’s a billionaire videogame designer instead of a professor now. Ms. Scarlett is now a young infamous actress. I don’t know. Did Clue need Paris Hilton? The murder fan in me says no, but the porn writer in me says yes.
I think the idea of updating something like Clue is something all erotic writers should think about. We update regular stories into porn all the time. If I was doing a porn version of Clue, I would certainly use characters that were more attractive. A Colonel was a standard codeword for distinction in Christie’s time, but now a days that same role of respect is held for basketball players. Change is inevitable.
The trick I think, is to disguise the change. I have a friend who collects classic Clue items. She loves Ms. Scarlett and Professor Plum just as they are thank you very much. She is freaking out over the changes. I think she would freak less and actually enjoy the new clue if it wasn’t called Clue. If they called it Clue 2, I think she would give it a try.
As much as satire is a part of porn, I think when we sex up something vanilla, we risk alienating the people who would most appreciate what we have done. A porn version of Clue might be cute but there is a resistance of what people expect and the perception that somehow your porn version is trashing the original. I think the more successful thing to do is to take what you personally like about something like Clue, and bring those elements into your original story. I think this allows readers to appreciate what you incorporated without having to make a comparison.
I really need to start working on that Hardy Boys/Nancy Drew idea I have.