If I have to watch a man get hanged one more time this week, I might look to see if I can install some sort of Death chip into my television that will filter out scenes of humiliation and death.
In completely unrelated news-
My wife and I went to a friend’s house yesterday to play Dungeons and Dragons, 2nd Edition, a game that is about 20 years old. It was a lot like breaking out your tapes and listening to music you used to hear in high school; or watching VH1 a lot. The nostalgia was overwhelming and made more so by the fact that we we arrived 20 minutes early and our friends were out shopping. So just like teenagers, we were stuck outside the house waiting for people to show up and let us in.
For some reason, this made me horny.
“Hey, want to make out?” I said.
My wife looked at me. “Here? In their front yard?”
“Sure, what could be more high school than playing D&D and kissing outside because your parents don’t want you making babies inside the house?”
She rolled her eyes. “I’m not making out in someone’s driveway.”
“Crap, I’m in such a teenage headspace I forgot the right way to do this.”
“And what’s that?” she asked.
I put my arms around her and bent my head down to hers. “I should have just done it instead of asking permission first.”
And so I did.