May 052021
 

Explorer’s Log: I am on day nine of my twenty-one day journey to the star system designated “The Queen’s Ability to Suck Your Soul,” by Royal Astronomers. The ship computers have finally finished analyzing the scans I made of the Entitled I captured. The creature’s genetic structure has been heavily modified to the point that I am not sure what kind of being the species was originally. That makes sense, as a species that is just a sentient cock wouldn’t be much of a competitor on the evolutionary stage.

From what I can tell, the Entitled’s body is designed to self-generate sustenance and feel extraordinary sexual pleasure. Large parts of the nervous system are dedicated to interfacing with cybernetic implants for the purpose of guiding artificial bodies. The brain is surprisingly complex and can retain amazing amounts of information. He could probably tell me everything I need to know about their technology if I could just get him to cooperate. Unfortunately, the scans tell me that his body is designed to also block unwanted painful stimuli.

Well, that explains why the first eight days have been such a failure. I thought starving him and setting extreme temperatures for his containment aquarium would get him talking but now I see I was wasting my time. If I am going to get his cooperation, I am going to have to engage him on a level he cares about. End Explorer’s Log.

Explorer’s Personal Log: If I’m being honest, I was going to get my hands on the Entitled today no matter what the scans said. It has been hard staring at a lifeform the shape of a thick cock and leaving it alone.

Vaquel Di sat down in front of the enclosure she had constructed. Glassteel walls surrounded a gravel bed. Standing erect on the gravel, was a red phallus dotted with white spots. The phallus pulsed with indignant fury.

The Entitled had a name. He was HoleBuster-442. Vaquel wondered if there was a HoleBuster-441 running around. She also wondered if it was a family name. For that matter, did Entitled even have families?

She knew that HoleBuster-442 was staring back at her. The creature didn’t have visible sensory organs but she knew he was taking in the sight of her. Today she was wearing a blue spacesuit stretched across her abundant curves. The seam of her suit was open to reveal dark brown skin and the top of her cleavage. Short pink hair topped her pretty face.

The speaker light was blinking. HoleBuster-442 was speaking. Vaquel turned off the mute button.

“-and then I will fuck each one of your ears! I will detonate my seed and fill your brains with my thick ooze!”

Vaquel shook the enclosure. The Entitled fell over onto the gravel. A long snarl emanated from the speakers.

“We’re going to try something different today, HoleBuster,” Vaquel said. “I had Chairbot power down and take a nap. I don’t want my robot interrupting us.”

“That’s HoleBuster-442!” the speakers crackled. “Are you going to try new insidious tortures? Try your best, slubie! Your pathetic attempts at torment only cause me amusement. Ha, ha! See? I am already chuckling at your ineptitude!

“Damn, you talk a lot and never about anything I want to hear,” Vaquel said. “Why don’t you tell me how the force fields on your ships work?”

“You will be forever ignorant of our weaponry, hole-walker!” HoleBuster-442 said. “It sickens me to my core to think of giving a slubie like you that kind of information! If you possessed our incredible force field technology, then you would no longer be preyed upon by other Entitled! You would disrupt the natural order of your inferiority! Your kind was made to be taken and fucked!”

“Refresh my memory, does your species like tits?” Vaquel said. She pulled on both sides of her spacesuit. Blue fabric parted to reveal large brown globes of soft delight.

The red phallus pulsed in her direction. The speaker was unusually quiet.

“Or do you need a better look?” Vaquel said. She leaned against the glassteel side of the enclosure. Both of her large breasts flattened against the wall. She shifted from side to side, dragging her hard nipples across the glass.

“Squash your milk-sacks all you want!” HoleBuster-442 said. He leaned to the left and to the right in sync with her breasts. “I will tell you nothing!”

“Hmm,” Vaquel said. She leaned back from the glass. HoleBuster-442 leaned forward inside his cell. Vaquel reached for two small nipple clamps she had modified. She brought them up to the enclosure and opened their jaws. The sharp points stretched open.

“Are you going to clamp those onto me?” HoleBuster-442 said. “Ha! I am shaking with merriment! I won’t feel a thing!”

“They are not for you,” Vaquel said. “See the little bit here at the base? That is a piece of your mech body control system. I connected it to the clamping mechanism. According to my scans, you should be able to remotely control it.”

HoleBuster-442 twitched, The clamp in Vaquel’s right hand snapped shut. It opened and then clamped shut again. The clamp in her left hand did as well.

“What is the purpose of this?” HoleBuster-442 asked. There was a faint hint of excitement in his voice.

“I will put these on my nipples,” Vaquel said. “I should let you know; my nipples are very sensitive. The slightest pressure makes me wet. Because they are so sensitive, that means any sort of painful pinch is unbearable. Do you understand?”

“And I will control these clamps?” HoleBuster-442 said. “Why would you do that? I will show you no mercy!”

“I’ll do it because you will have told me how your ship’s force fields work,” Vaquel said. “My computers have a link to your neural relay. Transfer the information about force fields, and I will put the clamps on my nipples.”

There was a retching sound from the speakers. “You want me to elevate you above your undeserving status with force field technology? Just to clamp on your enormous flesh mountains? Never!”

Vaquel brought one of the clamps closer to her nipple. It was a few centimeters away. The clamp opened and closed in a fury.

“So close,” Vaquel said.

The speaker growled.

Vaquel held the other clamp to her other nipple. She moved her shoulders to swing her breasts back and forth. The clamps chomped eagerly at her moving nipples.

“You wretched hole-walker,” HoleBuster-442 snarled.

“If you don’t give me the specs on your species’ force fields by the time I count to three, then I’m cutting off your control of the clamps,” Vaquel said.

“Unworthy stupid phallus sucker!” the speakers crackled.

“One.”

“Worthless underachieving slubie!” HoleBuster-442 yelled.

“Two.”

“Shit-maker!”

“Thre-“

“Stop! Stop!” HoleBuster-442screamed. “Here! Take it all you ignorant fluck! I doubt you will know how to even use it!”

Vaquel glanced at a monitor. The screen scrolled as it rapidly received the data from the Entitled. The amount of information was astonishing.

“Now do it!” HoleBuster-442 commanded. “Give me your flesh morsels!”

Vaquel, flush with excitement from the data transfer, pressed the clamps against her nipples.

The clamps bit down. Twin bolts of pain shot through Vaquel’s tits. The teeth grinded together. HoleBuster-442 manipulated the jaws with cruel expertise.

“Queen’s tit!” Vaquel cried. She grabbed the sides of the enclosure for support. Tears sprang to her eyes. The clamps were familiar toys, but the savage biting controlled by the entitled was new.

“Yes, suffer, slubie!” HoleBuster-442 said. “Feel my power! Take what you deserve for imprisoning your betters!”

Vaquel hissed through clenched teeth. The clamps were stars of pain upon her breasts. She didn’t remember them being this tight. Was the Entitled somehow amplifying their pincer strength?

“Tremble with agony, hole-walker!” HoleBuster-442 said. “Your quiver of pains brings me delight! Oh, how I long to wiggle against your flesh-mountains as you suffer!”

Vaquel smiled. She sat up and winced as the clamps pulled on her plump breasts. Leaning back in her chair, she pressed a button on her belt. A seam opened around her crotch and expanded leave her sex bare. The bright pink hair of her pubic bush nearly glowed in the ship light.

HoleBuster-442 pressed against the glassteel of her enclosure to get a better look. “Don’t try to distract me with your fur-burrow! It will not save you from my wicked bite!”

To prove his point, the clamps opened and flexed mere micrometers. It was just enough movement to cause Vaquel’s nipples to ache with new pain.

Vaquel reached between her legs and spread her pussy lips. Pink walls glistened with her juices. She clenched and the tunnel of her sex pulsed.

HoleBuster-442 groaned. The clamps bit down with new force.

Wincing, Vaquel let go of her pussy lips and reached for something else on her belt. She pulled out two pieces of metallic cloth and pressed them to the wall of the Entitled’s prison.

“What are these?” HoleBuster-442 asked. “I am unfamiliar with your primitive excuses for technology.”

“There are cunt prickers,” Vaquel said. Her voice ragged from the cruel clamps. “I had to use precious resources from my supplies to fabricate them. They are considered an interrogation and recreational device back home. They stick to the outside of my sex.”

“Why should I care about your filthy hole accessories?” HoleBuster-442 said.

“Because there are tiny extendable needles embedded into the fabric,” Vaquel said. “Usually they are controlled by voice-command, but it was a simple matter to connect it to your cybernetics. Give it a try.”

HoleBuster-442 was unusually quiet. An instant later, a hundred needles stabbed the glassteel walls of the enclosure. The needles retracted and emerged in rapid pulses. The tapping sounds from the walls sounded like a rainstorm.

Evil laughter boomed from the speakers. “Put them on now! I demand it!”

Vaquel shook her head. “What good are force fields without weapons? I have been trying to duplicate the lasers that your ships use, but the power source and frequency is beyond my scanners’ capabilities. I need more information.”

HoleBuster-442 wiggled. The clamps on Vaquel’s breasts relaxed to a dull sting. The Entitled fell over and continued to wiggle on the sharp gravel on his cell.

“Fuck,” Vaquel whispered. Is he having a seizure? Much of the creature’s biology was still a mystery. Was there a problem with the cybernetic connection?

“RAGESHIT!” HoleBuster-442 screamed over the speakers. The entitled jumped back up to is base and slammed into the wall of the enclosure. “Fucking slubie fluck whorser!”

“Is that a yes?” Vaquel teased. She pulled the cunt-prickers off the side of the prison and leaned back in her chair. With her legs spread wide, she dangled the metallic strips over het wet sex.

“It is unthinkable!” HoleBuster-442 said. “A slubie armed with Entitled weapons? It is an abomination! It upsets the natural supremacy! I would be the most hated Entitled of all time! The ultimate fluck!”

“I don’t know what that is,” Vaquel said. “Do you want to dominate my pussy or what? You have to the count of ten.”

“RAGESHIT! Here! Take it, slubie!” the speakers snarled.

New data filled Vaquel’s computers. The monitor displayed reams of text flying by. Diagrams and blueprints flashed and disappeared.

Vaquel smiled. The fucker actually did it. The need to hurt someone outweighed his loyalty to his species. She sympathized.

“Put them on, slubie!” HoleBuster-442 screamed.

Vaquel did what as he commanded. She pressed both strips to either side of her labia. Nanobot adhesives pushed past her thick pubic hair and secured themselves to the skin. Thankfully, the adhesives wouldn’t strip her hair out when she removed it later.

“There,” Vaquel said. “They are in place. FUCK!”

Hundreds of needles stabbed Vaquel’s sex. She gripped the arms of her chair in pain. The needles lingered and then retracted. A moment later, needles stung on her left side and lingered briefly before retracting. That is when the needles of the right side struck.

“Oh, perfect,” HoleBuster-442 moaned on the speakers. “I can see the agony etched on your face. When I escape from here, I will create more of these hole-stabbers and sell them to other Entitled. I will make a killing at a Tycoon Zone!”

The clamps on Vaquel’s nipples bit down harder. The fucker hadn’t forgotten about those. The clamps released and tightened in unpredictable patterns that happened to coordinate with the stabbing of Vaquel’s sex.

“Queen’s tit,” Vaquel babbled. She hadn’t been subjected to a cunt pricker since the Academy. It was too easy to forget just how insidious they could be. The hundreds of tiny needles not only pricked with stinging pain, but they also sensitized as they worked, making Vaquel more aware of every new pain she endured.

“Take it, slubie,” HoleBuster-442 babbled. “Call me you master! Do it!”

Vaquel grimaced. “You’re the one in the cage, cock-brain!”

Hundreds of needles stabbed Vaquel’s sex at once. The clamps bit down with force far exceeding their construction parameters. Vaquel’s nipples and pussy transformed into burning infernos of pain.

“Ow! No, Master! Please, don’t Master! I’ll call you whatever you want”

The needles retracted, or at least most of them did. Enough remained to keep Vaquel’s pussy feeling like it was being perforated. The clamps around her nipples relaxed and but still held on tight enough to keep her pinched flesh buttons throbbing.

“Yes, slubbie, I am your Master!” HoleBuster-442 moaned.

The Entitled pressed against the walls of the enclosure. His red body writhed and undulated against the hard glassteel. The white spots on his body pulsed. Lubricant fluid oozed from the slit in his head.

Vaquel smiled. Her vision was blurry with tears but she could see how aroused the Entitled was. Now was the time for the most important question.

“I want to know how the Entitled ship sensors work,” Vaquel whispered. It was hard to speak when your pussy was being needled. “I want to know what it takes to evade them.”

The relentless stabbing and retracting of Vaquel’s sex continued. “What can you possibly offer me for that?” the speakers rumbled. “I am the Master of your misery. No further torture is necessary now that I have your hole.”

Vaquel reached for her last surprise that she had kept under her chair. Pain flashed in her sex as she moved. The terrible clamps pulled at her nipples as her weight shifted. Fresh tears flowed down her cheeks as she picked up the small ring and set it down in front of the enclosure.

“This is a harness,” Vaquel said. “I modified some of the anti-gravity thrusters from my micro-probes and connected it to your cybernetics. If you wear this, you will be able to fuck me.”

All of the needles retracted. The clamps relaxed to a muted throb. Then, all of the needles stabbed at once. The clamps bit down with doubled strength.

“Is this true? Are you lying, hole-walker?” HoleBuster-442 said.

“Have I lied yet?” Vaquel said through clenched teeth.

“The hole-biter stays on if I fuck you,” HoleBuster-442 said. “And the clamps!”

Vaquel laughed. Instead of denial, he was negotiating. “Deal, but you can only fuck me until you come.”

“How dare a whorser like you tell me when I am done!” HoleBuster-442 screamed.

Hundreds of needles rapidly stabbed Vaquel’s labia. Her eyes rolled into the back of her head. In a storm of painful pricks, she felt the lightning flash of a near-orgasm.

“Take the deal, or keep humping the wall, cock-brain,” Vaquel said.

The speaker was silent. The small ring levitated off the table. HoleBuster-442 must have established a connection. The ring flew in tight circles and then settled back down.

“I accept, slubie,” HoleBuster-442 said. “Now open this cage!”

New data filled the monitor. Vaquel could barely see the screen through her tear-filled eyes. She pressed a button on the side of the aquarium and the lid retracted.

The harness flew up and into the cage. HoleBuster-442 stood up straight and the ring slid down his length and tightened around his base. There was a groan from the speaker and then HoleBuster-442 levitated into the air.

“Told you,” Vaquel said. “Now fuck me, cock-brain!”

HoleBuster-442 shot out of the enclosure. The phallic alien flew with surprising skill. As soon as it was out of the cage, it dived down towards Vaquel’s spread open legs.

The thick head of the red alien smashed into Vaquel’s pussy. She cried out as hundreds of needles grinded against her sex. HoleBuster-442 wiggled and burrowed his way inside of her until almost his entire length was submerged.

“Feel my immense girth, slubie!” the speakers cackled. “I know this is what you have been craving! All of your demands have just been a ruse to have me fuck you again like the cock-loving fluck that you are!”

At that moment, it was hard for Vaquel to deny. The arrogant alien felt wonderful inside her. Thick veins pulsed and grinded inside her in all the right ways.

The anti-gravity harness continued to work. It pulled HoleBuster-442 halfway out of Vaquel’s tight cunt and then plunged back in. After several punishing thrusts, the harness began to rotate, spiraling the phallic alien in and out like a drill.

The rest of the connected toys continued to punish Vaquel. The nipple clamps bit and relaxed in furious pulses. The stabbing needles from the cunt-pinchers tattooed sadistic designs into the over-sensitized sides of Vaquel’s pussy. Both sets of devices tormented Vaquel while the thick alien fucked her silly.

Pain and pleasure warred within Vaquel. Every fuck of the phallus agitated the stabbing needles. Every gasp of pleasure moved her breasts and caused the clamps to tighten. She groaned with pain. She moaned with pleasure. Her body was in a tug of pain between ecstasy and agony.

Ecstasy won. Vaquel climaxed and screamed her pleasure.

“Glory to the Queen!” she screamed.

The speakers grunted in response. “You love it, you whorser! You live for the pain! My cock in your fur-borrow justifies your existence!”

Vaquel came again. “Glory to the Queen!” Her pussy clenched despite hundreds of pricking stings.

“Your sex hole is so big!” the speakers crackled. “I have had tighter but not wetter! You are a sorry excuse for a fluck but I am going to rut your pitiful small brains out anyway!”

Vaquel came again. She grabbed both of her breasts and squeezed, not caring that she was grinding the biting clamps into her breasts.

“Oh, oh, oh!” HoleBuster-442 grunted. “You’re going to make me detonate! You’re going to do it! You filthy slubie, here I blast!”

Hot seed flooded Vaquel’s stuffed pussy. The alien jerked and wiggled. Vaquel felt a surge of sticky fluid fill her sex and spill out. Where did it all come from? She swore the amount was larger than the Entitled’s total mass.

After ten seconds of coming, HoleBuster-442 was suddenly still. It pulsed once more to eject a final load of seed into her sated sex. The needles retracted from Vaquel’s exhausted labia. Both the clamps relaxed but were still tight enough to barely hang onto her tender nipples.

“Damn, you’re a good fuck despite having no legs or hands,” Vaquel whispered. She reached between her legs to pull the alien out.

HoleBuster-442 suddenly withdrew from her pussy. More seed spilled out of her sex. The clamps bit down with full force. More needles, no, ALL of the needles stabbed her vulnerable sex.

“FUCK!” Vaquel cried out. Any afterglow was obliterated in a flash of sudden pain.

WHAM! Something thick and heavy slammed into her head. It left a sticky mess on her hair.

“Die you weak ignorant fluck!” HoleBuster-442 screamed.

WHAM! The flying red phallus smashed into Vaquel’s head again, knocking her out of the chair. She spilled to the ground, landing on top of her tits and the savage clamps. Hundreds of needles grindinded into her pussy.

“Computer!” Vaquel screamed. “Override: Cockblock!”

HoleBuster-442 fell to the ground. The speakers emitted a scream of helpless despair. The cunt-pincher strips dropped from Vaquel’s skin. Both clamps let go of her nipples.

“RAGESHIT!” HoleBuster-442 screamed.

Vaquel sat up. The wiggling red phallus was trying to crawl away from her. It was leaving a trail of pussy juice and alien seed. She grabbed it and gave it a good hard squeeze.

“RAGESHIT!” the speakers screamed again.

Vaquel kept squeezing. She knew HoleBuster-442 wasn’t feeling any pain, but it felt good to do it.

“I wasn’t expecting that,” Vaquel said. “I gave you a great fuck and you immediately tried to kill me afterwards. That is downright ungrateful of you.”

“Death is too good for you, slubie!” HoleBuster-442 yelled. “I was going to send out a distress call and then bargain with the first Entitled who came! My plan was to barter for a new body and then use it to fuck each and every one of your holes until you screamed in submission! When I was done with you, I was going to shave your head and wear your hair as a come-rag!”

Vaquel laughed.

“What are you laughing for, you stupid fluck?” HoleBuster-442 screamed.

“You’re a mean little dick,” Vaquel said. “I think I got all of the information I need from you, but I don’t know. Maybe I should keep you for a little bit.”

“RAGESHIT!” HoleBuster-442 screamed.

Apr 262021
 

Primal Skin is an erotic novel by Leona Rhys. It is set at the end of the ice age and centers on Skin, a human/neanderthal hybrid who is also an apprentice shaman. She teams up with Bat, a human shaman and Wolf, a Neanderthal dwarf shaman to solve a murder mystery. There isn’t that much investigating, but there is a lot of walking, discussions of tribal differences, prejudices and of course, sex.

Erotica books like this fascinate me. This is clearly a smutty take on Clan of the Cave Bear type fiction, which is really cool. Anything that gets sex novels out of offices and chateaus is fantastic. What blows my mind is that Black Lace published this hyper-niche novel. All praise to Leona Rhys for pulling that off.

The book itself was very compelling. I don’t know about actual anthropology to quibble with the speculative fiction here, but that doesn’t matter here. This is a book about prejudice and understanding. The sex scenes are actually a bit sparse, which again, was fine with me. The shaman rituals often take center stage and I believed in their power. It is the rare smut book that is spiritual in nature.

It is also a very bisexual book. Men and women equally have sex with one another in a way that is taken matter-of-factually that is refreshing. This leads to some rather complicated love polygons.

If I had to critique the book, I would say the plot needs a little tightening. There is a LOT of walking. As a reader of 80’s fantasy fiction, I recognize the fashion but have long burned out on it.

All in all, Primal Skin is a weird, beautiful creation of erotica that is unlike anything else made at the time, or even now.

Apr 232021
 

Today is my birthday. I turn 48, which is a mind numbing number. That looks like the age of a Call of Cthulhu RPG character that I deliberately age to get more skill points in Ancient Egyptian and Library Use. Real people don’t have that age.

Last time this year, I was in month two of the lockdown, picking up carryout from restaurants and watching horror movies on my computer. That was in-between worrying about President Orange Shitstain and obsessively following election news with the prayers that Democrats get their shit together.

This year, I will be picking up carryout from restaurants, watching Mortal Kombat and playing Pandemic Legacy Season 3 with my wife. Orange Shitstain is just a bad memory and I already have my first dose of the COVID vaccine. Things are getting better and I just got to hold out a little longer.

Getting older is weird. You pick up a lot of information and wisdom. I can make a much better burger than I could a year ago. But you also forget shit too. I get halfway through some movies before realizing I have seen them. Experience feels like a zero sum sometimes and but hopefully more sticks than gets forgotten.

One thing you do retain is how special the things you love are. That could be people, music, fiction or whatever. If you love something, enjoy and appreciate the hell out of it. Nothing is guaranteed to be here tomorrow, so enjoy that shit now.

I’m looking forward to seeing what the next 48 years bring.

Apr 212021
 

Christina rolled the last burrito and placed it in the pan. She stepped aside so I could sprinkle the cheese. After I was finished, she opened the oven door and I slipped the pan in. While she cleaned the counter, I checked the recipe and set the timer.

“We got eight minutes to kill,” I said.

“Good, clean the frying pan while I load the dishwasher,” she said.

“I was hoping we could do something else,” I said. I stepped behind her and placed my hands on her hips. The bulge in my pants pressed against the crack of her ass framed by her sweatpants.

Christina laughed. “We’ll never finish in eight minutes. Those days are long behind us.”

“Who cares about finishing?” I said. “Can’t a man just fuck his wife for eight minutes if he wants to? Or is the honeymoon already over?”

“Yeah, I think that happens after twenty years,” Christina said. Her ass pressed back against my trapped cock. “And it is probably seven minutes now.”

“Then we better hurry,” I said.

“Well, take my pants down already,” Christina said.

I hooked my fingers into the waistband of her sweats, making sure to catch her pink underwear as well. As she took a step back, I pulled them down and helped her step out of them. After the Easter Incident, we don’t fuck with our pants around our ankles. As I set her sweats on the table, Christina leaned forward and braced herself on the counter. A dark bush peeked from beneath her thighs.

My pants and underwear took less time to remove. Christina was already stroking her pussy. The wet sound hurried me along. I stood behind her and pressed the head of my cock to her lips. Slick fingers guided me in.

We moaned together. Our bodies joined once more. My hands on her hips, her elbows on the counter, we began to fuck.

The timer ticked on. Hips and ass created slow steady claps of sound. Groans and the occasional gasp filled the kitchen.

A plate moved. A cup rattled in a bowl. Spoons rattled together.

“Are you cleaning?” I asked. My hips kept moving.

“Just a little straightening up,” Christina said. Her sex clenched tighter.

I growled in disbelief and amusement. My hand grabbed her long black hair, streaked with gray. A sudden pull and there was a cry of pleasure. My hips slammed into her with increasing fury.

“Fuck,” Christina said. It was both a swear and a statement of fact.

It turned out that eight minutes was more than enough.

Apr 192021
 
She’s not filthy now, but give her a page.

Filthy Fetch Quest is another sex novella from Serena Silverlake set in a fantasy world. It tells the story of Alexandra, an impatient adventurer who made a really big mistake and was gangbanged by horny goblins. They stole her money, her sword, her armor and left her a sticky mess. Alexandra is greatly annoyed by the loss of equipment and money, but was happy to have the sex. She is that kind of an slut.

What follows is how Alexandra recovers from such a setback. Did I mention that is a slut? Because she does most of her recovery bent over, on her knees and stuffed full of cock. finally, she takes on a quest for a wizard, the filthy fetch quest in the title. It involves more cock.

This book was a delight to read. Equal parts filthy and funny, I was constantly smiling. Alexandra was raised in a brothel and has a very sex-positive attitude to everything. She is not a dumb bimbo, but she is impatient and that gets her into trouble.

You know, it is a tricky thing to write a slutty character who keeps messing up. In the hands of a lesser writer, Alexandra would come across as stupid, or worse, a bad stereotype of a clueless slut. This story does a great job of portraying Alexandra as that friend you have that doesn’t quite work things out before hand, but still manages to come out on top. her healthy attitude towards sex gives her a leg up (or legs open) advantage that other characters in the world don’t have. It results in stories where the character engages in hot transactional sex, but as an aggressor instead of a victim.

This is the second of Serena’s books that I have read and I am turning into a fan.

Apr 162021
 

Billy is a high school kid who wants to get a basketball scholarship so he can go to Denver College with his girlfriend. His guardian, Aunt Cheryl, wakes him up every morning by crawling over his nude body and rubbing against his face before whispering in his ear. As you can imagine, Aunt Cheryl isn’t happy with the idea of hot young Billy moving away.

What I described sounds like the start to a lot of taboo porn stories, but no, this is Butcher, Baker, Nightmare Maker, a horror film from 1981. Aunt Cheryl, the most inappropriate older aunt figure ever, cannot keep her hands off the boy and wants to keep him around. To do that, she will stab a television repair man and claim he tried to rape her. There, that should keep Billy around.

From here, the movie takes a detour from creepy-aunt touching. The lead detective finds out the repair man is gay and therefore wouldn’t rape a woman. He gets hung up on the gay part and assumes that Billy must be gay and they had a lover’s quarrel. The detective fills the movie with homophobic slurs and threats of gay-bashing while ignoring that Aunt Cheryl is the real killer.

Interestingly enough, the homophobic detective becomes a secondary bad guy and gets his comeuppance as well. It is remarkably progressive for an 80’s slasher film. By the end of the movie, the detective is completely disgraced as a character and the only other confirmed gay character is a hero!

But Aunt Cheryl is the real star of the movie and eventually the movie remembers that. Aunt Cheryl escalates to keep Billy around. Billy gets roofied before the big game. Teenage Julia Duffy gets hit upside the head. The nosy neighbor gets gutted. Once the killing restarts the bodies start dropping fast.

I will say, this movie was a fascinating display of cringe. Aunt Cheryl’s every action with Billy is disturbing. Later reveals about her relationship to Billy DOES NOT make it better. Even when she dies in the end, her dying action is try to get an open mouth kiss from her nephew.

So yeah, Butcher, Baker, Nightmare Maker. If you wish there were more slasher movies with sexually deviant older women, then this is for you!

Apr 142021
 

The video feed of my boss, Nadine, filled the monitor. She wore a burgundy pant suit today. We have been working from home for over a year but she still puts on work clothes. The matching lipstick is a bit too dark for a workspace, but no one would complain. The lack of a bra and shirt under her jacket means her pale freckled skin contrasts sharply with the suit.

Nadine wore a dark eyeshadow that gives her a slightly sinister look. Right now, they are staring at me. There is a hint of a smile on her lips.

I jacked my cock at a slow steady pace. The head of my member wa red and a drop glistens on the tiny slit. It would be so nice to speed up and climax already, but that is forbidden. I will stay hard until Nadine grants me permission.

“We reviewed twenty more audits today,” Carol said. “Five of them were unsatisfactory. Of those five, two were due to incomplete information . . .”

Carol droned on. It was hard to pay attention. My focus was on the contour of Nadine’s breasts under her suit top. I could almost picture where my boss’s nipples were.

Conference calls were my hardest challenges. Nadine insisted that I provide entertainment for her. We had a video link to each other’s computers. Every call, whether I was on it or not, she turned the link on.

Worsen I had to pay attention. Nadine might quiz me later. It was not good to fail those quizzes. That would mean the clamps. Or the ice. Maybe even the dreaded rubber bands.

“The last unsatisfactory audit was filed with an outdated form,” Carol continued.

“Was it the TH-99?” Sara asked.

“It was,” Carol said.

“I thought we had finally eliminated those documents,” Sara said.

My cock dried. It would be easier to spit but Nadine forbade it. There was a chance someone might hear. I had to lick my hand instead. It tasted like dick.

“I want a full investigation done,” Nadine said.

Her voice was cold and stern. I groaned but bit my lip just in time to stop it.

Nadine’s eyebrow arched. She looked right at me through the monitor. Did they hear my groan on the call?

My heart accelerated. If someone had heard, then maybe they would report it to Human Resources. I would be investigated. They might find out about Nadine and all of the improper ways she abuses the boss/employee dynamic. There would be firings and mandatory training for everyone else.

I guess technically, she would be the one that got in trouble, but if she got fired, who would tell me to do the filthy things I love to do?

“I’ll let Steven know,” Carol said. “He has been the point person for updating the forms.”

“I bet he will know where to look,” Sara added.

No one heard my groan. My heart was still pounding but it was going to be okay. That had been close.

“All right, go on with your report, Carol,” Nadine said.

As Carol resumed talking, Nadine pointed upwards with one finger. I was to go faster.

My stroking increased in speed. Oh, I was close. This was going to be much harder to keep from coming. It was a suitable punishment.

Apr 122021
 
Strangely, no one wears a white suit in this.

FantasPussy Island by Will Buster is a brief novella set in the year 2344. Jon, a horny guy with no personality, goes to the famous resort of FantasPussy island where every woman there will fuck you. Jon fucks, he fucks a lot and then goes home. Around page 130, something of a plot emerges and then the story is over. I wasn’t a fan.

The thing is, I don’t like to talk about bad porn novels. Every piece of smut is someone’s favorite and there is enough negativity in the world without me bashing a book. This might be will Buster’s favorite piece of work and I wouldn’t want to be the guy who takes a dump on it. Live and let write.

But something strange happened while I was reading this book. The descriptions and word choices made me wonder if the book was written for an especially lowbrow audience. Then I started to wonder if the writer has touched a woman. A few pages later, I wondered if the writer has ever touched a penis. Things got so weird that I wondered the writer was asexual and was just writing what he thought people did during sex.

And then I realized what was going on. This book has been translated from another language, and probably poorly. Take a look at these exact quotes.

“She rimmed him savagely and then his warm wetness squirted up her shit hole!”

“His cock was damn itchy and super hard.”

“He groaned with searing sex pain as more and more of his baby milk erupted into Tina.”

“Her tits jutted out in perfectly-shaped triangles that promised superb pleasures to touch and grasp.

It’s just not me, right?

So yeah, Fantapussy Island. If you need ridiculous sex talk then this is the book for you.

Apr 072021
 

Explorer’s Log: I have reached the star system designated “The Ecstasy of the Queen’s Slightest Touch,” by Royal Astronomers. There are twenty-three planets in this system and all of them are inhabited by the Entitled and their bipedal clone slaves. It may take a few days to catalog every planet while also dodging Raider ships.

The ninth planet is less populated than the others and therefore the safest to explore personally. There is a curious lack of technology on the planet, except of course for the automated clone tanks underground that occasionally spits out new clones. The clones themselves use only primitive hand weapons and live as nomads. Animal life is abundant with almost no carnivore species. Weather patterns are mild and produce is plentiful. It fits the criteria for a Garden Planet and if verified, it will be another jewel for the Queen’s collection.

The Entitled must use this planet for their war games. I have witnessed this on other worlds. The Entitled like to collect harems of soldiers and battle each other. No doubt the lack of technology is just another variant for them. The sadistic bastards must enjoy watching the clones fight with such inefficient weapons.

I want to examine one of the clone tanks. Maybe I could learn something about the bipedal clones that would let me exploit them on other planets. Sensor scans have detected a possible tunnel entrance in a sparsely populated area. I will go down and see what I can find. End Explorer’s Log.

Explorer’s Personal Log: Thanks to Chairbot getting mugged at the last station we visited, I only have one miserable weapon capable of taking on an Entitled and it’s a laser that I have to strap to my wrist. I should be okay. All the clones are carrying edged weapons and clubs; I am sure the Entitled are similarly armed. The fuckers do like their rules.

Vaquel Di squatted down in the tall grass. A cool breeze blew past and the vibrant blue grass wavered like ripples in a pond. Small birds flew in lazy circles under a clear orange sky. The rays of the bright sun warmed the soul as well as the body.

It was nice. No, it was fantastic. The sun and the breeze felt good on Vaquel’s bare skin, and today, there was a lot of skin. Instead of her normal skintight spacesuit, Vaquel decided that she needed to blend in better with the local population. She wore a white loincloth made of synthetic fur that covered her pink pubic bush but barely covered her large brown buttocks. Around her chest was a synthetic white fur bikini top that struggled to contain her massive dark tits. The scanner she used was cleverly disguised as a water gourd that she wore on a strap. She also carried a spear that she made from a tree, but that was mostly to show she was armed. For real protection, she carried the laser that Chairbot had bought, but covered it with a synthetic fur wristband.

The only thing missing from Vaquel’s disguise was dirt and filth, but she wasn’t that committed to authenticity.

There was movement in the grass. Vaquel stayed perfectly still. About ten meters away, a small group of nearly naked humanoids walked by. There was two men and two women. They stuck close together and constantly looked in all directions.

Were they hunting? They looked a little too fearful for that. A bird took flight and all four of the humanoids dropped to the grass and hid.

“Not much of an army,” Vaquel thought to herself. On other worlds, the Entitled liked to fight each other with proxy armies of sex slaves. If these primitives were soldiers, they were poor ones at that. Then again, maybe the Entitled liked the challenge of leading such cowardly forces. Who knew with those phallic assholes?

The small group took off running to the east. Vaquel wondered what spooked them. Probably their own shadows.

Vaquel returned to the task at hand. She tapped the side of her ‘gourd’. Holographic numbers appeared in the air. Power readings were nearby, which meant there was a possible entrance to the underground clone tanks.

But where? Vaquel stood up. Fields of blue grass stretched in all directions. The wind blew and set off waves of movement in the swaying grass.

“Fuck. Meter by meter circle scan it is,” Vaquel said. She stuck her spear in the ground to give her a central point. Gourd in hand, Vaquel began to walk an ever-expanding circle around her spear.

The readings were unusual. The ground had been disturbed in multiple places, and there were signs of collapsed tunnels. Something burrowed through this region and did it often.

Vaquel had a theory. The clone factories were underground, and they supplied the world with a steady supply of clones for the Entitled to abuse, but you would also want to protect the clone tanks from being broken by foolish clones. What if the clone factories shipped their clones to the surface somehow? Maybe with a tunnelling vehicle?

On her sixth circuit around her planted spear, the gourd-scanner beeped.

That was when the ground erupted. Dirt and grass flew into the air around Vaquel. Instinctively, she reached for the pistol she normally kept on the belt of her spacesuit, but all she touched was the synthetic fur of her loincloth.

Cold metal grips encased Vaquel’s waist and lifted her from the ground. Strong pincers cinched around her ankles and spread her legs apart. Another pincer snatched her loincloth and ripped it away.

It was a giant crab of some sort with a long oblong body and multiple limbs. Vaquel counted four legs and three sets of arms of descending sizes. The largest arms and pincers had her waist. The second largest held her legs apart and the smallest set of arms had stripped her loincloth. There was no discernable head or eyes, though there were some curious looking whorls on the surface of the shell.

Wait, that looked like a metal shell. Vaquel grabbed the arms around her waist and felt a hard alloy. This was no natural creature; this was a mechanized body.

Could this be the vehicle the clone factories used to deliver clones to the surface? The shell was big enough to hold a clone, although it might be a little cramped. Vaquel decided to wait and see what the crab did.

“Aren’t you a big clone!” the crab said in crude Palatino. The sound came from speakers on the arms. “I’ve never seen this color of hair before. Are you a rare?”

It was a fucking Entitled! Now that Vaquel knew what she was looking at, she realized the whorls on the shell was actually writing. It read, “HoleBuster-442.’

Something touched her head from behind. One of the smallest arms had extended around her. It stroked her short pink hair in an almost pleasing manner.

Vaquel was annoyed by her naivety. The clone slaves on this planet might be restricted to primitive weapons, but the Entitled wouldn’t feel compelled to handicap themselves that way. These bastards had just as much respect for rules as Vaquel did.

It was a good thing that Vaquel had her wrist laser. The stupid crab hadn’t bothered to restrain her hands. She just needed to figure out where to aim. Fuck that. She would just shoot every bit of it until it stopped moving.

One of the small metal hands went to her sex. It was surprisingly tender. The pincer rubbed up and down the slit of her pussy.

Vaquel decided to hold off on shooting it just yet.

“Is the interior of your fur-burrow as big as the exterior?” HoleBuster-442 asked.

Vaquel wasn’t sure how the primitive clones on this world talked, so she kept her mouth shut. She squirmed within the crab’s pincers but was careful not to actually wiggle free. To complete her disguise as a helpless captive, she bit her lip in mock-fear.

The small pincer pushed inside Vaquel’s sex. The ridges on the claws felt wonderful. Vaquel clenched down and shuddered.

“That’s a good fit,” HoleBuster-442 said. “I was out here spawn camping for new clones. I like to snatch them as soon as they crawl out of the ground. There is nothing like new slubie holes. I like to be the first Entitled they get in their little fur-burrows.”

Aha! That confirmed Vaquel hypothesis about how the clones get to the surface, though she didn’t think they would dig their way up. It showed a lack of concern about the clones and their safety. That was something to think about.

The Entitled’s story about ambushing newly born clones also confirmed her very well documented theory that the Entitled are all assholes.

The claw began to pump inside Vaquel. It moved slowly, exploring the depths and tightness of her slick sex. The small arm swiveled and looked for new angles to plunge into her.

Vaquel clenched her mouth shut. It felt great. She wiggled her pelvis as much as the pincers around her waist would allow. One of her breasts fell out of her tight fur top but the Entitled inside the crab didn’t seem to notice.

“I’m going to make this fur-borrow my cock-lair, but I have to make sure you’re wet enough first, slubie,” HoleBuster-442 said.

Vaquel whimpered submissively. Some of it was acting.

The pincers holding Vaquel’s ankles spread her legs wider apart. Just when she thought that her legs couldn’t spread any further, the pincers stopped. The stretching was just on the edge of being painful. Vaquel felt terribly exposed, which only turned her on more.

The wind gusted around them. The tall blue grass bent in submission. The cool wind kissed Vaquel’s pussy lips as she was being fucked.

The claw inside her sex moved faster. It pumped in and out with mechanical precession. Between thrusts, the claw would rotate one hundred and eighty degrees before plunging back in. The ridges on the claws grinded wonderfully against the walls of her pussy.

It was getting harder for Vaquel to keep quiet. The Entitled was damn good at what he did. Tremors ran down her spread legs. The urge to clench her thighs around the thrusting claw was incredible and being denied that urge only made her wetter. She grabbed her exposed breast and brough the nipple to her mouth. Biting down on her soft flesh sent a shiver through her body and kept from crying out.

“You enjoy that, don’t you, you over-sized slubie,” HoleBuster-442 said. “Your fur-borrow is so lucky I am fucking it! No one invades a fur-burrow like me! This is the best you have ever had!”

Vaquel shuddered with pleasure but her analytical mind couldn’t help judging the alien’s statement. It was good, but she was sure that she had better. A few past lovers came to mind as well as once or twice with her own hands. She stayed quiet though. The Entitled were like most cocks in that they were made of mostly ego.

Something touched Vaquel’s thigh. It was the other small crab hand. At some point it had stopped petting her hair and she forgotten about it. This one gently pinched the inside of her dark thigh. It was light enough that it didn’t hurt, but the extra stimulation made her skin all the more sensitive. She bit down harder on her plump breast to keep from screaming.

“I know what slubies like,” HoleBuster-442 said. “Once they take a ride on my claws, then I invade their fur-borrows personally. You’re going to beg me to keep you but I’m going to get my trophy, toss you aside as soon as I finish. I’ll be fucking another slubie while you spend your days and nights wishing I would come back for you! But I am not going to come back! I fuck them and leave them! That is what I do and you are just going to be another poor slubie dreaming about me being inside you again!”

The Entitled’s unlikely scenario enflamed Vaquel’s lusts. She pictured herself wondering this primitive planet in search of this one alien. Her pussy would ache and drip but nothing could every satisfy her again. She would give up traveling through space just to get fingered by a crab machine again.

Sometimes the more ludicrous fantasies are the ones that Vaquel needed. She climaxed. Pleasure blossomed from her pussy and spread through her body. She cried out her pleasure in a primal scream.

“That’s right, soak my claw,” HoleBuster-442 said over the speakers.

The claw came to a stop inside of her. Vaquel shuddered with the aftershocks of her orgasm. She opened her mouth and her exposed breast fell from her lips.

Oh, that was nice but Vaquel still had a mission to do. Maybe it was time to wrap this up and shoot herself free. She looked down and tried to judge where to best fire her shot. Maybe at the joint where the arm connects to the shell? She pulled the fur wristband covering from her laser.

“Now you are ready for me,” HoleBuster-442 said. “Prepare to be astonished!”

The small claw pulled out of Vaquel’s sex. She whimpered at the absence in her pussy. The large claws holding her waist pulled her up and over to the top of the crab body. The pinchers holding her ankles brought her legs up and together, stretched out in a sitting position.

“Behold my immense power!” HoleBuster-442 screamed.

The top of the crab shell cracked open. A red cock with white circles emerged. Cybernetic implants at the base of the phallus secured the Entitled to his mech body. The alien phallus throbbed and pulsed.

Vaquel looked down. It was a nicely shaped and a bit thick, but ‘immense’ might have been an exaggeration. Still, she wouldn’t mind having it inside her. She pulled the fur wristband covering back over her laser. Maybe the alien could fuck as well as he fingered.

“I can see you are stunned by my giant size!” HoleBuster-442 said. “Even your giant fur-borrow might not be able to contain me! Prepare to be stretched beyond your wildest dreams!”

Vaquel bit her lip to keep from laughing out loud.

The large crab arms lowered Vaquel down towards the Entitled. The tip of the phallic alien wiggled against her pussy lips. The arms kept lowering Vaquel as the Entitled slipped inside her. Down she went until she was completely impaled on the boastful cock.

Vaquel shuddered. The Entitled wiggled and writhed inside of her. It wasn’t the biggest that she had ever had, but he was certainly among the most mobile. Her closed legs added to the snugness of the fit. The Entitled’s frantic writhing inside of her was hitting all the right spots. If he vibrated, he would be damn near perfect.

“Yes! So much delicious fuck cream!” the crab speakers blasted. “Feel my power within you! Take the best cock you will ever have in your pathetic slubie life! Prepare for ultimate fur-burrow drilling!”

The crab arms suddenly lifted Vaquel’s body upwards and then dropped her back down on the Entitled’s impaling body. The collision of the metal shell on her bare ass stung like a slap. The thick alien rammed deep up inside her. A split-second later, the motion repeated and kept going.

“Fuck!” Vaquel cried out, forgetting her pretense of silence. The rapid fucking caught her by surprise. The hard metal shell of the crab smacked her ass with each drop of the claws. Her remaining breast bounced out of her fur bikini top and now both tits flopped wildly. She grabbed the large claws for support but her fingers slid off the smooth metal.

The claws used Vaquel’s body as a sleeve to fuck the Entitled. Despite the incredible speed, the claws never lifted Vaquel high enough for the Entitled to leave her pussy. The squirming alien filled her sex with each jarring impact. Juices drenched the Entitled and formed a puddle on the crab shell.

Vaquel gritted her teeth. Her ass burned from the rapid collisions with the shell. Both breasts bounced and swung with their own centrifugal force. The position of her closed legs meant every drop was snug and constricted. Her pussy melted from the non-stop pounding.

The helplessness of the situation increased Vaquel’s arousal. She was being used like a toy. The Entitled wouldn’t let her spread her legs to release some of the tightness. With the exception of her secret wrist weapon, she was being completely dominated. Another climax was swiftly fucked out of her.

“Glory to the Queen!” Vaquel shouted. A group of startled birds took flight from the tall blue grass.

“Yes!” the crab speakers hissed. “Spout your savage babble! Crumble in submission as I claim your fur-burrow!”

The fucking increased. Vaquel sobbed in bliss. Her ass was a stinging star. The wiggling phallus inside her ravaged her captive pussy. One of her breasts slapped her face and she didn’t care. She threw her head back and stared up at the clear orange sky as another orgasm rose within her.

“Glory to the fucking Queen!” Vaquel shouted again.

“Yes!” HoleBuster-442 shouted. “Yes! Yes! This is my cock-lair now! This wet slick hole belongs to me! Oh-I’m going to detonate!”

The crab claws suddenly stopped. Vaquel’s large brown tits slapped her again in the face before dropping. Her tender ass burned against the multiple slams into the metal shell.

Hot seed filled Vaquel’s sex. The Entitled spasmed inside of her. The thick seed stuffed her slick pussy and spilled from her sex lips.

“Ohhhhhhhhh,” the crab speakers blasted.

Vaquel caught her breath. She hadn’t realized she had been panting. The crab arms stayed tight around her. The pincers around her legs kept them stretched out.

Should she escape now? There was a clear line of sight to the joint she had picked out earlier. Vaquel held her fire. Maybe the Entitled wanted to keep fucking. She wouldn’t mind another round.

Oh Cruel Queen, did that mean she was addicted to the Entitled’s cock body after all? Had HoleBuster-442 been telling the truth? When she left, was she going to pine for him?

Vaquel snorted. That was ridiculous. No, she was just willing to have a little more before she left this planet. That was perfectly normal, right?

A minute passed. HoleBuster-442 was silent and also still. The wind blew and was cold against Vaquel’s nipples. She stuffed her tits back into her white fur bikini top.

Another minute passed. Vaquel became impatient. She clenched around the alien.

“No more, no more,” the speakers crackled. The crab arms lifted Vaquel upwards and forward. The alien slipped out of her sensitive pussy. Seed and juice splattered down onto the shell. The Entitled sunk back down into the depths of the crab body as the opening in the shell sealed shut.

Vaquel was disappointed but she noticed it was a normal level of disappointment. It wasn’t an insane level of disappointment that meant she was addicted to his alien body. No, what she felt was a normal response to having a good fucking and wanting just a little more.

Then again, Vaquel was a bit tired. It would be nice if the Entitled would just let her go and be along his way. It would save her the trouble of fighting him. Besides, after a fuck like that, she was feeling merciful.

The crab arms let go of her feet but the larger arms held onto her waist.

Another part of the crab shell cracked open. A new arm came out. There was something sharp on the end of it. The sharp end began to buzz.

“Hold still while I get my trophy,” HoleBuster-442 said. “Don’t interfere or it will cut your hands.”

Trophy? Vaquel had seen this before. One Entitled took pictures of her tits. Chairbot reported that some Entitled on the station he visited liked to collect articles of clothing. Maybe HoleBuster-442 wanted to take her loincloth or her top.

The arm with the buzzing tip moved towards Vaquel’s head. Understanding crashed into Vaquel. The fucker was going to cut her hair!

“Fuck this!” Vaquel said. She pointed her wrist laser at the buzzing arm and fired.

ZAPPP! A crimson beam sliced right through the shaving arm. The top half of the arm fell to the ground.

“That was a laser! Slubies aren’t allowed lasers!” HoleBuster-442 yelled.

The claw arms tightened around Vaquel’s waist. Crushing pain assaulted her pelvis.

ZAPPPP! The laser sheared the crab arm at the joint where it connected to the shell. The pincer popped open. ZAPPP! Vaquel shot the other arm and dropped to the ground.

“Oh spoor,” HoleBuster-442 said.

ZAPPP! Vaquel shot one of the legs out from under the crab.

“Stop! Wait!” HoleBuster-442 said as the mechanical crab scrambled backwards on its remaining legs. “This body is not equipped for laser weapons!”

Vaquel laughed. ZAPPP! There went another leg.

Two of the crab arms lunged towards Vaquel. She danced back and fired. ZAPPP! ZAPPP! The arms fell to ground.

“This isn’t fair!” HoleBuster-442 yelled. “Slubies are made to be hunted! Not to hunt us! Who gave you a weapon, you ignorant savage!”

ZAPPP! Vaquel shot out another leg as she circled the crab.

“I bought it,” Vaquel said. “From a weapons dealer on a space station. Well, my robot did.”

HoleBuster-442 gasped. “I fucked an off-worlder? Ewww! Fine, go away! I don’t need a trophy anyway!”

Vaquel stopped firing. She pulled lightly on her damp bush. “Really? You don’t want this nice pink hair in your collection?”

The crab body stopped retreating. “Maybe just your pubic hair?” HoleBuster-442 said.

“No,” Vaquel said.

ZAPPP! ZAPPP! ZAPPP! ZAPPP! ZAPPP! ZAPPP! ZAPPP! ZAPPP! ZAPPP! ZAPPP!

Sparks flew from the perforated remains of the crab machine. Whole sections cracked open and spilled parts and circuits to the grass. Hydraulic fluid pumped like burst arteries. The smell of burnt metal hung in the air despite the breeze

Vaquel reached into the wreckage. She felt around and wrapped her fingers around something soft and terrified. Pulling her hand free, she looked at the red phallus with white spots that she had captured.

“Come to think if it, maybe I want a trophy.”

The Entitled wiggled in terror.